BREAK-UPS (My Story)

Your life changes when you meet them, but when it goes wrong it goes wrong. I've just been dumped after 5 intense months of love and sometimes passion. He said we needed a break, fat chance of that happening. If he wanted a break, its becuase he's found someone else that he likes and now wants to persue them instead of me. He's a liar, and lied about where he was one night, it makes you boil inside with hatred that why does he have to lie to me, the truth would be far better. Its those simple things that get us going. When they lie, it makes you wonder why they lied in the first place, was it something that he's trying to hide or is it that he hates me now and doesnt want me to find out he's having an affair.

The moment it hits you that they want to split, it breaks your heart and you cry so hard it hurts to speak. I was shocked, I thought he would have made some changes, or offered some plan to make it all better. Its those words,
"we need a break" that gets into our minds and breaks our hearts to peices. I found no happiness until today. I broke up with him, or HE broke up with me on Tuesday night wednesday morning at around 3am, after a few hours of arguing and finding out what he really wanted. It was my intention to draw out his plan, and indeed he told me what it was - BREAK-UP.

The moment you leave and sleep somewhere else in the house/flat, its weird and crying will always get the better of you. Suspicious is what he made me, and lying is what he did, and hurt me was whats he has done...

He made no effort to alter the relationship at all to make it better, he just wanted to break up.

Its now thursday and Im here on my own, in a place full of people I've never seen or met. Im in a library preparing to go out with a guy I know from my local Cinema and all of his mates. My ex-boyfriend might be jealous and jealous he should be. Im no longer his and after all im single now so I can do what I want... he doesnt want me back but still wants to be friends!!! We live together and now its hard to even see his face. My love for him, cause I did really love him, he's my first proper relationship I've ever had and it felt great... now its over! I should keep reminding myself its over and done with... I dont need someone who never gave me love back in a way that I needed. He kept telling me he needed his space and I gave all the space I could emotionally give him, but it wasnt enough and this took its toll on me, leading to my unhappy weeks in the past, where i would reflect on myself if we had an argument or disagreement. Now tonight im off to rule the world and have the most exciting night I can have. This guy im going to see at the picutres, is gonna make it my best night ever - guaranteed.

If you've just broken up or have broken up over the past weeks, you'll understand what needs to be done, you need to reach out there with you friends and get the EX out of your head. There not worthy anymore, if they have the power to end it, then you can officially end it inside you. If you need to find a man or women that fits your needs, its not re-bound at all, your just looking for what you didnt get in your old relationship, as in my case i needed intamacy, and he shyed away from it, making me look to other ways of getting it... promise me this, i've never cheated never will if Im with someone, and when you break-up you can always have that against them, when you suspect they cheated! Of course we hate them, but being friends, they can be there own friends, as if they dont want our love, why do they still want to see us as friends!

Imagine your favourite place to be and take someone else there to cheer you up, laugh at the bad points your EX had, like silly laugh or even the way they spoke down to you. My ones I can laugh at well, im sure sometime in this life he'll read this and wonder is it him or not... well of course it is. His name begins with N, and the thought of what he's done to me makes me angry, and THATS whats keeping me going to suceed in what I will do from now on.

Im still hurting inside now will so much pain, I could cry for hours like I did the day after, I've never cried that hard and loud before. And when love is love, its hard to get rid of the past.

A new life and love will come my way, which there are many coming my way. I can pick and choose as a single person to who I want. This time its me me me. In the end if they drop you and dump you, we are all we've got to help us beat the blues and pain...

SO advice is:

Go out for a month and let your hair down, do different things in terms of sports that your partner never wanted to do. I now I have many things he never wanted to do. What a waste of time he was then!

Till a few days I will come back and show you how far I've gotten over it, and if I can do it (as an emotionally sensitive person) then you can to... and like I did, write about it, and put it online!!!!! So you know the world will read it...