What's the secret to make your ex boyfriend jump over hoops, climb over mountains and walk over fire to be with you, spend time with you and devote himself to you?
I'm going to explain this in a general way and then give some tips on how to customize whether you are in a relationship,
married, or single. The basic principle is the same and it's just a matter of integrating it into what works best for you personally. The idea is women love to be adored, right? If you're a woman, you love to be adored, be pursued, and cherished-to be "wanted", in a word.
Let me suggest a two-step process. One, you get the man to respect you. And two, you tell him that you respect him, because a fundamental difference between men and women is that women want to be adored. They want to be pursued. They want to be fought for. However, men want to be admired for pursuing, for fighting for, for winning. You see, the main thing that a man wants from a woman is respect, to know that she's proud of him. There are countless examples of this in movies and in folklore and songs that illustrate this very same idea.
You can have a relationship that has a lot of passion without having any respect. This is what happens when women get into relationships that are damaging. She'll find a guy who's really attracted to her and passionate, but he doesn't respect her. Big problem. Without a man's respect, your relationship doesn't have a really good chance of being very healthy because then it's just passion, and if a relationship is built on passion, it's kind of like building a diet on chocolate cake.
Yeah, chocolate cake is great every once in a while; it's great to look forward to; it's great to anticipate; and it's great to desire those things. However, we wouldn't want to eat chocolate cake three times a day. So the tip is this: Earn a man's respect and then tell him that you respect him. What do I mean by that? First, you earn a man's respect by respecting yourself. This comes in all sorts of forms, and you'll want to personalize this for your own life so that it can be genuine.
It can be as simple as not being physical early on or just setting appropriate boundaries -- convictions that you actually stick to. As a man, I can tell you that a man loves a woman with convictions because we find it challenging, not to mention it's very attractive.
So develop your convictions and your boundaries, and then once you've earned his respect-and you'll know when you do-you will be able to honestly say to him the things that he wants to hear. "Baby, I'm so proud of you" or "There's not another man who I want to call mine." You might also say, "I noticed these difficult things that have been going on in business (or personally) and you make me very proud to call you my boyfriend/my husband because of the way that you handle them."
Men have very fragile egos, as you probably know, and the one he looks to the most in order to repair it, is you. He's not going to look to his buddies to repair his ego. He's not going to be vulnerable enough with them. So, if you can earn a man's respect and then tell him through words like, "I'm proud of you" and "You've done a good job" and "Wow, you've shown great courage" then you'll find that this man will never want anyone else.
You may be tempted to tell him that you love him when he's challenged or that you support him or any of those things-but those are the things that you would want to hear. What a man wants to hear is: "I'm proud of you. You're amazing. I can't believe the courage or the resolve that you've used." I hope this helps and thanks for reading!
