How Can I be an Effective Communicator?

The following are the steps which is meant to be followed if one wants to become an effective communicator

Communication Part 1: Listening/Observing

It is possible to segregate the process of communication in two most fundamental parts: the first of them is the sub process related to the act of observing and listening. It has been measured that a person can utter around 100 to 175 words per minute. On the other hand it is possible for a human being to listen intelligently at the rate of 600 to 800 words per minute. Due to the fact that during listening only a small portion of our mind tires to concentrate, the mind can drift easily during the process of listening.

Active & Effective Listening

Now the steps which may help me or some other person in actively listening will be discussed in details. Firstly, one has to get his or her mind back from wherever it can go with the flow during the course of a conversation: being capable to focus on a particular person for a stretch of time may sometimes prove to be very tough. But practise of effective listening helps here. With continuous exercise of effective listening a person can be able to pay attention to some other individual with no casual thoughts disturbing the peace of mind. Many past academicians are of the view that meditation can help a person in this particular practise. This may happen due to the fact that meditation prepares our mind in particularly this way. The other way through which persons get deviated from a communication process is by rehearsing the answer in his or her mind at the same time when the other person involved in the process of communication is still in the course of speaking. This might actually lead to missing some very important points in the message of the other person in the communication process. Thirdly, it may be possible for a person to concentrate on several other factors to make a process of communication more engrossing for him or her which may actually lead to better concentration during the process and stopping the mind from thinking of other things. Focusing on the other person’s body language may help in this particular practise. It is important for a person to observe how his or her counterpart in the process is sitting or standing.

Build Rapport through Mirroring

Building relationship is very important in making sure that communication process which is taking place is effective and efficient. Through this process it is possible for a person to mirror or match what the other person involved is doing despite the fact that he or she is listening to the correspondent. The body languages can be mirrored during an effective communication process. For example we can say that one can position his or her legs in the same way as the other person involved, and put his or her hands in a way alike. This helps in keeping both the persons involved in the process on the same wavelength. This also tends to make the persons more accessible to one has to speak. It is also very important to follow the kind of language which is being used by the other person. If one takes not of the kind of words which are being used by the other person and then use the same vocabulary with them, the probability is higher that he or she will be better understood by that person.  This also helps in building a better rapport with the person. [Read about System Thinking]

Communication Part 2: Responding

The most important thing which has to be learnt in this segment is the fact that a person can make the process of communication much more easy if he or she keeps the tempo, tone and rhythm same as the other person who is involved in the communication process. When a person speaks in a quick speed, he or she should slow down his or her normal speed of speech while interacting with a person who speaks slowly in comparison to him. After matching the tempo with the counterpart in the conversation it is important for the person to understand and identify if the conversation has been successful in terms of coding and encoding of ideas. It is very important to match all the three factors of tone, tempo and rhythm. Some people say that this process is not as fruitful as some other processes since they do not get the benefit of the process due to the fact that they cannot effectively and efficiently match all three factors with their counterpart in the conversation.

Use Positive Directions

The other one of the most imperative things which one needs to know for having an effective communication is how to respond to the other person with the use of positive sentences. Using of positive sentences does not only include being nice to the other person involved in the process. The basic meaning of responding with the positive sentences is communicating with a purpose of being not negative. We can easily transform the "do not do this" to "do this". It may be more difficult for a person to process the idea of not doing something which may lead to some kind of misunderstanding of the thing which is not to be done.

Take a Meta-View

The final thing which one needs to know for being an effective communicator is the understanding of the objective of the communication he or she is a part of. It is important for all of us to get into the conversation with this view clear in the mind. This will help us to enable us in identifying the relative success or the failure of the communication process. This will effectively enable us to change our future course of communication which may seek to attain same kind of objectives. If the objective of a particular conversation is to make a friend feel happy, it is possible for us to understand if we have been successful in our purpose or not just by understanding the body language of the friend or by comparing the tone of his just before and just after the communication process. Or if the conversation seeks to obtain some kind of benefits from the superior at work, then we can certainly put side by side the boss’s mood just before and just after the conversation. It will be possible to make out if he or she is willing to grant the favour by his or her attitude with which they will treat us. For positive proof if I have been able to impress someone with the process of communication it is important not to snap judge and base the idea on the results of a number of conversations. This is important since there are other factors also which may influence the mood of the correspondent like his or her internal state of mind etc. Hence it can be said that it is very important to have a "meta-view" of the scenario. It will not be fruitful if one concludes about his or her communication and related skills just based on one or two occasions.