Restoring Belief in Achieving the Impossible

Restoring a house is not about maintaining sanity.  Nor is restoring a house about improving relationships with your family or spouse.  Further, restoring a house is not about saving money.  You see, restoring a house is about needing certain skills, such as plumbing, carpentry, and electrical – or at least that’s what the brochure should have said in BIG BOLD PRINT.  When you are a motivational speaker and your spouse is a high school principal, those skill sets aren’t necessarily in the package.  Nonetheless, the desire to buy a dilapidated, bug-infested piece of dry rot was an insatiable need for two crazy young people in love.

Ah, the romance of a historic Cape Cod home in the picturesque seaside village of Mahone Bay, Nova Scotia.  I use the term “home” now on purpose, because that is what we purchased – a home.  If you’ve ever walked into your “home” while house hunting, you know when you find it that you just have to have it. Read, “justifying bidding war for broken house.”

I don’t know whether it was a lack of quality sleep with my wife being seven months pregnant or the fact that we hadn’t had a stiff drink in months – that eggnog is what got us “in trouble” in the first place – but for some reason, when our realtor, Richard, showed us a home that even Bob Vila wouldn’t tackle, we knew we just had to have it.  We were such idealistic lovebirds.

With the real dirty work quickly moving behind us – OK, two years later – hindsight is coming in at 20/20, or at least 16/20, perhaps because we’re drinking eggnog again.  In any case, that hindsight has taught us how to restore our home without selling our children or their future while ensuring our children will have two parents who are alive and well.  In my continuous pursuit to help people achieve great personal and professional success, I invite you to consider the following tips on restoring belief in achieving the impossible.

Lesson One: D-Y-I (Dude-Yer-an-Idiot)

You and your family must first become very comfortable with the fact that you are all certifiable to be doing what you are doing.  That acknowledgement of insanity will serve you well when you are, say, picking out two bugs for every chip from a bag of chips and scooping the scum off the top of your water in a feeble attempt to rehydrate.

Believing in yourself and your vision is essential for a project of the magnitude of home restoration.  There are no bells and whistles for a job well done, and there is no rest once that job is completed because it simply leads to another.

Lesson Two: Big Guns

Sometimes you need to bring in the big guns – in our case, the people with the hammers that are attached to air compressors.  I’ve got a nice Estwing hammer that I’m not afraid to use, but when it came to building 457 feet of fence (that needed to be straight) from scratch, I wasn’t the guy for the job.  So pocket your pride and pull out your wallet because some jobs around the house are not made for the homeowner.

Hire the right people for the right job.  If you don’t, you’ll end up doing the same job twice – once yourself, and the next time by an industry expert.  If you think you’re going to save money by doing everything yourself, it’s time to pick up your calculator and put down the scotch.

Lesson Three: Passion Fruit

Know who is eating the passion fruit for what projects.  If you are the driving force behind the lunacy of home restoration, be cautious about what you request of your partner, family, or friends.  You will have to make some extreme compromises if you are the fruit-eating glutton.  By that I mean you may have a certain building plan in mind – what is logical, if you will.  But remember that there are others living in the self-imposed dirt prison. If they want a certain project done that will make them happy, shut up and do it.

If I didn’t listen to my wife, this dream of restoring the Cape Cod would be over long ago.  I might not always agree on doing certain projects to make this mess livable for her and our daughter Tait. Quite possibly I might want to use our “re$ource$” for something else, but at end of the day, I want to be with my wife and family; the home is a bonus.

Lesson Four: Just Put the Reciprocating Saw Down!

What a wonderful tool the reciprocating saw is – it can tear out anything in seconds flat.  “Like one time at band camp…” Seriously, take out only what needs to go.  You are restoring not destroying, which means don’t go ballistic with the saw.

Pull things out logically, piece by piece.  Try to save and use what you can of the things you dismantle, and above all, don’t pull something out just for the sake of pulling it out.  Make sure you have a solid plan and work the plan.  Stop to think, because the vibration and noise of something that powerful can be intoxicating.

Lesson Five: Bling, Bling

Contrary to what you may think, you are not your banker’s best friend.  Sure, she knows your first name.  Sure, she smiles when you grace the bank with your presence.  And sure, she is a nice person. Beware: finishing your vision on bulky borrowed money will put stress on your spousal relationship.

Just because your banker wants to give you more money doesn’t mean you don’t have to give it back.  Yes, interest rates are good now, but can you handle what you’ve borrowed if we hit 16 percent again?  Think before you drink from the money trough.

Lesson Six: Through the Woods to Grandma’s House

Be certain you like your in-laws and parents because, hopefully, you are going to get to see them often.  They can provide invaluable support, from free (because you have no money for anything other than the money pit that the bank owns) babysitting to skilled labor if you’re lucky.

Make sure that you have some support systems in place.  Our family and friends have been our greatest asset through the craziness of home restoration – from organized painting parties four days before my wife gave birth to going for an overnight visit while the fumes vacated our home.  Every little bit helps.

Lesson Six: Scream “Sociable!”

Here in Atlantic Canada, we have a tradition of raising our glasses in unison and screaming, “Sociable!” when we party.  It is an expression of fun and enjoying being together.  I’d say that probably the most important thing you can do to get through any difficult endeavor is to rejoice in the projects you complete.  In our case, we share our home with others; invite them in.  They tell us how well our renos are going. 

You can lose sight of your own progress when you’re in the thick of achieving your vision.  Take time to remember why you got into your particular mayhem and try to have fun.  Life is about the journey not the destination. And hey, as my father-in-law says, if you’ve decided to live in an old house, “You’re gonna die with a hammer in your hand.”