Saying Grace Over Whatwegot Soup

For reasons that escape most males and all good old boys, women seemingly have been genetically programmed to reorganize things at inconvenient times. There doesn't appear to be a schedule or event to set off this behavior. It often just comes out of the blue. The other day my wife said, "We need to take all the books off the bookshelf in your office to dust and organize them. I've got a few more books to put in there."

This leads me to a piece of advice for any of you men trying to do a bit of work from home; never let your office serve as a guest bedroom. You lose control of the space and wind up being lucky to have a corner in which to work. My books, documents, papers and all other assorted work related material are relegated to a space just big enough for the dog to sleep. This is true even though I'm in it every day and guests are rather infrequent.

However, something good did come out of removing all the books from the bookshelf. I noticed how many cookbooks and diet books we have. Why they are all stored in my office is another question. So now I'm thinking that writing a diet or cook book is potentially a marvelous idea. I've heard the guy who published The White Trash Cookbook made lots of money.

Please understand that if we eat at home once a week it is special. You know that cooking is not very important when your third television set gets more use than the stove. So why would we need all these cookbooks? Don't know the answer to that one, but every time a new diet or cook book comes out we've got to have it. Take a deep breath and browse through our cook/diet books, though I'm certain it is not a complete list.

Microwave Cookbook, Jenny Craig Cookbook, Healthy Home-style Cooking, Natural Healing Cookbook, Encyclopedia of Cooking, Jane Brody's Nutrition Book, Sugarfree New Orleans, The Allergy Self Help Cookbook, 1st Place Favorites, Holiday Favorites, Home Cooking, Low Cholesterol Gourmet, Cook Right 4 Your Type, American Cooking, Joy of Cooking, and The South Beach Diet.

All of these books have one thing in common. To my knowledge I've never eaten a single meal prepared using these books except for the cookbook I use on rare occasions. But we keep buying them, and therein lies the key to fame and fortune. I'll ask all you great readers for recipes and then publish a cookbook.

The next step is to think of a really catchy title such as, COOK LIKE YOUR MOMMA WANTED TO. Maybe an appropriate subtitle would be, The Cookbook For People Who Think Home Cooking Is A Myth. That's what makes this a wonderful plan. Since it won't actually be used for cooking we can put almost anything in it and even tell folks how they'll lose weight.

The losing weight part is true because after trying my recipe for Whatwegot Soup, not eating will seem pleasant. By way of explanation, Whatwegot Soup is prepared by placing anything I can find that isn't moldy or over one year past the expiration date in a pot with water, pepper and salt. You let it cook down to a mush and then say grace before eating. That saying grace thing is extra important before eating Whatwegot Soup.