Guardianship Of A Parent: Elder Law Attorneys Can Help You Establish Boundaries

It's never easy to file for guardianship of one or both of your elderly parents, but there are many times when it has to be done because your parent is no longer able to care for himself or herself or make sound financial decisions. In either case, elder law attorneys can help you establish boundaries that are appropriate while still providing the oversight and additional care your loved one now needs. But what kinds of guardianship are there? Can you file to be a guardian while still giving him or her some autonomy? Elder lawyers can help you determine what path is best for your loved one and your family

Talk To A Guardianship Attorney

A guardianship attorney will explain the complexities of being a guardian and help you decide whether you need to have power over that individual or over his or her estate. If you gain guardianship of the person, you will be responsible for making medical decisions, making sure they are safe, properly clothed and taking care of themselves. On the other hand, control of their estate means you'll be making monetary decisions for them, including paying bills, making purchases and determining what is best for them financially. In some cases, you will need to become a guardian of both their finances and their person, particularly if they have advanced dementia or Alzheimer's. Regardless of whether your parent or loved one needs a guardian, they will probably fight you on this issue, fearing loss of autonomy and independence. There are ways, however, to maintain their dignity while taking care of crucial facets of their lives for them.

Don't Force The Issue: Elder Lawyers Offer Valuable Suggestions

Once the court has appointed you the guardian of your parent or loved one, you can make daily or financial decisions for them, but you will be held accountable for those decisions by the court. You can't arbitrarily make decisions that aren't in your ward's best interests. By talking to elder law specialists in your area or social service workers who are familiar with guardianship issues you will learn some tips that will make the transition easier for both your ward and your family. It's in everyone's best interests if you can oversee their health and their finances in a way that maximizes their independence while minimizing restrictions.

Encourage Their Participation

A guardianship attorney will tell you that the transition period can be extremely difficult if you don't handle your new position in regard to your parent or loved one with dignity and respect. Be sure to include your parent in any decisions you need to make such as choosing an assisted living facility or nursing home. You can certainly narrow down the choices to three or four locations that fit the estate's budget and your own sense of what your parent needs, but be sure to let your parent visit each of them and add his or her own input. If you force them into a location that they don't like, neither of you will be happy.

Giving Wards Autonomy Over Some Choices

For day-to-day living, elder lawyers advise that you let them make as many personal decisions as possible as long as they aren't endangering their health or that of others. If they can still make their own meals and are eating a balanced diet, let them. You should only step in when they have crossed that line between independence and self-neglect. A guardianship attorney may be able to illustrate some scenarios that help you understand which is which. Elder law recognizes that your parents may make choices that are unpleasant but not life-threatening or damaging to their well-being. For instance, if your father contributes a lot of money to a charity you don't approve of, as his guardian you don't need to take that choice away from him unless he is giving them most or all of his estate and leaving himself destitute.

It's crucial to understand the areas of elder law that influence guardianship of an ailing parent or loved one so that you don't cross a line and end up alienating them or taking away the little bit of independence and dignity that they need and deserve. An elder law attorney can explain the various elder law issues involved and help you navigate the uncertain landscape of guardianship.