(Note to reader: As always, of course you need to be willing to take all consequences of your actions.) 100 people aged 100 were asked: “What do you regret most? What would you do differently?”
The majority answered: “I wish I had risked more”.
We regret the things we don't do, far more than the things we do. Fear STOPS us living. We get a sense of security.... which can be upset at any moment anyway. Control is an illusion - we can't control events. So it’s a sad joke on us humans that the people who try hardest to live in their comfort zones get upset the most.
Once we accept that we can’t control life, and that comfort is not very fulfilling, we are free to risk. What can happen? Rejection, moving into a smaller home, losing our partner, breaking an arm, losing a job we like etc. But above all we fear looking silly, foolish, or failing at something.
What would your life be like if for the past 10 years you had lived without fear?
What if life is a game, and we've forgotten? We attach significance to everything - no I can't ask her out because XXXX, I shouldn't apply for that job - I wouldn't get it. I'm not going to take singing lessons - I'm not any good.
If you feel you are at risk of regretting not fully living your life when you lie on your death bed, I invite you to complete the following exercise:
Optional Exercise: Write down three areas where you play it safe. Pick one area where you are willing to risk more. Play a bigger game. Live LIFE! (Is it dating? Communication - telling the truth ALWAYS! Going on a holiday - backpacking through South America? Making a commitment - moving in/marriage? LEAVING a relationship!!? Pick one, and share it with a friend.
Top Ten Suggestions To Risk More
(Note to reader: As always, of course you need to be willing to take all consequences of your actions.)
1) Tell the truth, regardless of the consequences
2) Say ‘no’ when you feel ‘no’
3) Ask for what you want in your job (e.g. location, pay rise)
4) Go for the job you REALLY want
5) Ask out that guy/girl you REALLY want to go out with
6) Ask for something you REALLY want in your relationship.
7) Move to where you REALLY want to live
8) Say ‘yes’ to something with an uncertain outcome.
9) Book an adventure outside your comfort zone (e.g. horse riding, white water rafting, sky diving, sailing.)
10) Be vulnerable to someone you’re arguing/in conflict with.
Enjoy,
David Wood
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