All tied up - what is holding you back?

Last week we touched upon fair exchange. What are you worth and are you asking for what you are worth? The next question then is - do you believe that you can achieve or receive what you ask for?

Many of us have self limiting beliefs. We say we want something, and then we sub consciously close the doors to opportunity that we need to fulfill those circumstances. We do this by saying I want or I need but underneath is that little voice that says "really"? You think you deserve this? And the negative “what ifs” begin to surface. What if I fail – what if I cannot pay for it… etc.

Recently I visited a ‘luxury condo’ nestled deep in the mountains near a ski resort I frequent. As we drove through the condo area I could barely close my mouth – I was in such awe of the surroundings. The value I placed on the condos mentally immediately indicated to me that we could not yet afford such a luxury!

But instead of driving by, I suggested that we stop in at the sales centre. Surprisingly the price tag was far less than what I expected – and immediately we made the decision to walk through the show unit. Once we stepped into the rustic show home we learned that all we saw was standard – slate floors, fireplaces, and mountain views. I had seen this home in my mind many, many times – and now I was standing in it!

The choice was now mine. Did I believe that I should be there – or did I think well this is nice – but I never saw us owning a place like this? Even after I knew the place had my name on it – those limiting beliefs began to arise.

First came the comment from the sales rep – “you mean you would just move here?” Then came the mental objections and negative what ifs? What if we cannot sell our house – what if this is a mistake?

Here is where the self imposed limitations can limit our achievements. Many of our decisions on what we can achieve are based on past experiences. In other words we base our belief on our abilities on what we have achieved before this point in time. If we have experienced a failure or defeat – or seen someone close who has, then we base our beliefs on that information. But what if we turn the what ifs around?

“What if I make 50% more this year than last year? What if we buy the new condo and get offered a fantastic job that brings in twice as much? “What if we get offered 50% more for our home than we think it is worth?” Wow – almost instantaneously those what ifs get us excited and help our beliefs grow!

These possibilities are only as close as you think they are. Perhaps the first part of the possible dream is only the smallest part! What if we began to embrace the belief that ANYTHING is possible – and even likely?

Take some time this week to think of an outrageous achievement. And start to ask what if – in a positive way. What if the universe is planning for your success? (Surprise – it is!)

"One of the keys to effective communication and dispute resolution is understanding ourselves and how we think and also understanding how others are wired as well.  Each of us has personality styles that are unique to ourselves - however there are also patterns as well.  When you understand the differing personality styles and their blends - you begin to see people as they are with more understanding!  For more information on understanding personality styles please contact Mandie at president@roaringwomen.com."