Timeless Wisdom For Modern Leaders - Lead Through Building Relationships

Lead Through Building Relationships

Wise leaders know that leadership involves growing together with those they are leading.

Leadership is an ongoing relationship based on common values. In practice it generally takes the form of a series of meetings and interaction with individuals and groups.

King Solomon, a leader synonymous with wisdom, says:“Reliable communication permits progress.”

For leadership to be strong, the relationship with those involved in a project needs to deepen through increased understanding and participation in the greater value being created together.

A positive relationship develops the intellectual, emotional, social, and moral sides of those involved. Initiating a dialogue is important. Gradually, we develop security and social strength.

High level transparency and high energy opens us up for learning and development. We begin to see each other’s strengths: of group members and of those in our surroundings, which creates a positive momentum. We can then also easier see and focus on our own strengths.

Solomon says, “Pleasant sights and good reports give happiness and health.”

Wise leaders are characterized by a willingness to serve others. They place the co-workers’ interests at the center and give attention to everyone’s important contribution to what they want to be and to create. By demonstrating this dedication to giving, they inspire the members of the group to support each other’s needs.

Wise leaders make others feel significant and needed. They cultivate a genuine love for people, which means that they care about their well-being at various levels.

Solomon also says: “Anxious hearts are very heavy but a word of encouragement does wonders!”

Wise leaders recognize the importance of different ways of being supportive and giving appreciation to their co-workers. They are generous with encouragement and praise and often compliment those they lead.

Cooperation with a supportive and appreciative leader makes the employees feel valuable, motivated, and respected in their working situation.

Solomon says, “Gentle words cause life and health; griping brings discouragement.”

Wise leaders create confidence and focus on the good of the people they are working with.

They are aware of the power that words have and use their language with care, always focusing on the positive and constructive.

In this way they motivate those around them to bring their very best into the situation and lift energy and self-esteem.

When something is not working as expected, leaders help the employee to get back on the right track and move their energy in the right direction. They show respect for their employee’s thoughts, and are available and responsive.

To receive attention and be validated is linked to our deepest needs. It creates an openness and positive self-esteem among employees/team members.

Solomon also says: “In the end, people appreciate frankness more than they do flattery.”

Wise leaders know that to encourage and appreciate others their actions must be based on authenticity and honesty. They genuinely want to see other people develop their strengths and potential.

We need other people as mentors and coaches for our development. And when we develop this deeper relationship, we understand more of what life’s riches can give us.

Solomon says, “Don’t refuse to accept criticism; get all the help you can.”

Our own reaction to receiving feedback will determine how open others will be to giving it and how they themselves will react to the feedback we give.
Wise leaders look at criticism as advice from the others and as a gift. They know that there is always something to learn. They always take into account the views of others.

When what others are saying seems relevant, they weigh the feedback against the bigger picture and discuss their reactions and thoughts with people they have confidence in.

In this way, they are liberated to act and develop their own strength and ability to evaluate and constructively handle every situation they will face.

Solomon says, “The wise man learns by listening.”

Wise leaders know that nothing affects the quality of their relationships more than their willingness to listen to others. They know the importance of being good listeners. First they seek to understand, then to be understood.

Real listening creates trust and trust is what leadership and relationships are built on.

There are two very good reasons for listening to other people. We learn something, and people are more inclined to open up to us. When we listen, we are showing respect for our co-workers and fellow man.

Solomon says, “A soft answer turns away wrath, but harsh words cause quarrels.”

Wise leaders know that conflicts between people are natural. They arise in all relationships. Having differences of opinion is healthy. No one has all the answers.

If we show that we really are listening, asking questions, trying to understand others’ standpoints and reasons, we will probably come closer to a solution. With a soft word, we can help resolve these differences of opinion.

Solomon also says: “Everyone enjoys giving good advice, and how wonderful it is to be able to say the right thing at the right time!”

Wise leaders carefully consider when, where and how they are most likely to get a good response in supporting people with feedback. When someone’s action or behavior does not work as was expected, wise leaders give feedback in a private conversation and as soon after the situation or event as possible. They support and strengthen the person through being calm, patient, specific, and constructive.

Praise is one of the best forms of feedback. When we as humans get encouragement, we feel secure and open up for development and growth.

The objective of wise leaders is to ensure their employee’s success. They feel a personal satisfaction in seeing others develop and grow to reach individual and shared objectives. In doing so, they are building long-term, trusting, and positive relations for mutual development and success. Their mission is value based; to be part of and create a better world.

To become a wiser leader:

• Make people in your environment feel valuable, motivated, and respected.

• Focus on the good of your people and develop their strengths and potential.

• Be aware of the power that words have and use your language with care always focusing on the positive and constructive.

• Be authentic, honest and straightforward in your communication.

• Praise and compliment often from a genuine and honest point of view.

• Be a good and active listener with the intent to first understand, then to be understood.

• Create more of a dialogue with people in your surroundings – ask many questions.

• When you give feedback, first carefully consider how to best express your thoughts, then choose the right moment.

• Be open, transparent and sensitive to criticism – take the perspective that there is always something to learn!

• See conflicts as a natural part of all relationships.

• Seek to understand other’s points of view by asking sincere questions.

• Cultivate a genuine love for people, building long-term, trusting, and positive relations for mutual development and success.