There are five techniques that I shall share with you. They have been proved to be effective in resolving, minimizing, and preventing conflicts. And by conflicts I am referring to any of the following that take place between two or more people: misunderstanding, miscommunications, arguments, disagreements, mixed messages, fighting, etc.
PERMISSION TO REPUBLISH: This article may be republished in newsletters and on web sites provided attribution is provided to the author, and it appears with the included copyright, resource box and live web site link. Email notice of intent to publish is appreciated but not required.There are five techniques that I shall share with you. They have been proved to be effective in resolving, minimizing, and preventing conflicts. And by conflicts I am referring to any of the following that take place between two or more people: misunderstanding, miscommunications, arguments, disagreements, mixed messages, fighting, etc. A. I-Message: Use this approach to convey a message to someone when:
Put an I-Message into action by following these sequence of steps:1. Get his attention. (Call person by name.) "John, Bob, Sue, Mary, ..."2. Identify your emotion. (Identify and name the emotion you are feeling.) "I feel/am happy, angry, mad, excited, etc. ..." 3. Name his misconduct. (Identify the behavior that is offensive.) " ...when you slam the door, spill juice on the clean floor, call me names, etc. ..."4. State the consequence(s). (Identify the consequence that you wish him/her to change. And stop! Be extremely cautious not to ramble because by doing so you run the risk of throwing a spark on the cinders.) "... because it/you causes me to jump, have to remop the floor, be disrespected, etc."Putting it together it should sound like this: "John, I get angry when you slam the door because it makes me jumpy." (Stop! Wait for a response!) Research has shown that the response is 95-98% non-confrontational or aggressive.) Remember: This approach lets the person know that, although you disapprove of his (or her) behavior, you still care about him. B. You-Message: Use this approach when you want to reflect to your listener what you're observing. [Reflect the emotion.] (Identify and name the emotion you are observing.) (Call person by name), "You seem happy, angry, mad, excited, etc. ... "C. Active Listening: Use this approach when you want to let someone know that you're truly paying attention. Do so by totally involving your eyes, ears, and body. Pay attention to his body language, move close, cup your hand over your ear, lean forward, etc.D. Paraphrasing: Use this approach when you want to make sure you did not miss what was said. "So, if I understood you correctly, you said there were only 5 spaces."E. Summarizing: Use this approach when you want to break up lengthy conversations into smaller pieces that you can remember and understand. Rather than let the other person ramble on about what all he did last weekend, take control by asking to tell you about each day's events before moving on the next.Put it all together. Begin SOARING to the top of the Mountain when you:
Remember: When you maximize your potential; we all win. When you don't, we all lose. Copyright © Etienne A. Gibbs, MSW, The Master Blog Builder
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Living in the Age of the Internet Gangster, Part Three of Three: Sleeping with the Phishes . . .
One of the newest phishing trends to emerge has almost everybody in the security industry concerned: Trojan phishing. So-called Trojan programs, named after the horse of mythology that put the Greeks inside Troy's city walls, disguise themselves as beneficial files, but actually enable hackers to gain access to computers from remote locations to steal account information directly from a computer.Living in the Age of the Internet Gangster, Part Two of Three: An Evolution of Professional-class ..
Members of the hacker community throughout that region now are adapting to take advantage of the latest phishing scams. As a natural transition is taking place, "phishing" is the term applied to online schemes that attempt to lure people into giving up sensitive information, such as passwords or credit card numbers, by masquerading as trustworthy sources.Your Child's First Year at College: Prime Target for Identity Theft?
If your son or daughter is a recent high school graduate and college freshman, he or she is the ideal target cybercriminals are looking. "Why?" you might ask. For cybercriminals the answer is easy and highly profitable.