Online Dating Tip: The Upside of Non Commitment

In the offline world, it is not necessarily a good thing; particularly if two people have been sharing quite a bit of time and space.

There may not have been an actual conversation but it was understood that the two were moving in the obligation direction. They did everything to give the impression of being committed to each other only to find that it was all for naught.  After all the energy and emotions that have been invested you can pretty much bet that result is going to leave a bitter aftertaste.

In the online dating world however, non commitment is not necessarily a bad thing. In fact if utilized correctly it can be a valuable tool that can save you plenty of hassles, false starts and headaches. 

Online dating puts you into contact with large numbers of people who may become potential dating partner. That means your emotions could be on display more than you would like. It also means they could be sent on a never ending roller coaster ride. That’s not healthy so maintaining a non committal attitude in many circumstances can help to keep your emotions in check. This is beneficial because it can be a major asset in protecting you against:

1. The Drama Act One

Have you ever known someone who no matter how calm things seem to be always has some drama going on in their lives whether external circumstances or self inflicted?

You can meet countless people like that in cyberspace. It’s not that you want to be unsympathetic to their situation but if you are not careful you could find yourself living those highs and lows right along with them. One drama is enough. Now imagine juggling a few of them at a time. You have got enough going on in your life that the last thing you need is to be an actor waiting in the wings of someone else’s drama.

2. Overabundance

The thing that makes online dating such a phenomenon besides the ability to make an almost instantaneous connection with someone is the enormous amount of people you can choose from.

And that’s also the problem. Because it is a huge number, online dating can be overwhelming. Where do you start, what direction to you go in, how do you want to go about it and plenty of other questions can have your head spinning out of control. Therefore stepping back and assessing the situation in a reasoned systematic could be of great benefit. It may sound cold and it probably is but it beats letting your emotions take total control and run so far ahead of you that there is no chance that the rest of you will ever catch up.

3. Trial and Error

And it is just that. You meet someone you start to hit it off but after a few more cyber chats you decide there is no need to pursue this any further. Now you meet someone new and this time you think this maybe the one. Except they decide after a few more chats that they are really not interested in you. Next!

As you can see, something like this can easily wear you out if you are not careful. Therefore if you are going to go thru this process (and it is just that) than it is important not to be so involved with every new person you meet.

None of this is to say you should be like an unfeeling robot whose working thru a math problem. If you do that than you only miss out on the many wonderful people who may not be dating partners but instead turn out to be good internet friends. If you are going thru this process it is crucial that you enjoy yourself on some level.

The non commitment aspect has everything to do with your emotions. Very few people get lucky the first time out when it comes to internet dating. They have to work through it. This can take a heavy toll on your emotional state. A little non commitment can protect you and make the journey hopefully more enjoyable.