Three Meals and a Side Dish - The Tale of an Unbalance Romantic Relationship

How will you be spending your Christmas dinner this year, spreading holiday cheers, or shedding holiday tears?  

 Have you ever been played by a player in the height of the holidays?  It’s a sad, but unfortunate truth that there will be at least two or three women maneuvering to hook the attention of one man to sit at the table with them and share the celebrated annual Christmas dinner this year.  This unbalanced three-to-one predicament is nothing new to the ongoing competition the women have endured or indulged in all year long.  However, what adds even more pressure at this time of the year is what the holiday season represents.  Christmas is a time that is associated with traditional family bonding, spreading merriment with relatives and loved ones, and attending early morning church service, even if you haven’t done so since Easter. 

People plan months in advance for the Christmas season—whether to buy the right gift or to prepare the right meal for the eagerly awaited Christmas dinner.  In many households, this particular dinner, whether silently eaten or boisterously celebrated, reflects a symbolic cohesive family bond more so than any other meal throughout the year, including Thanksgiving.   Here is the dilemma: It is a know fact, that this can be one of happiest days of the year for many people, yet sadly for others, especially for a single woman in an affair with a married man, it is one of the most depressing times.  This is because she knows all too well that settling for a part-time lover, will only give her a part-time guarantee (if any at all), whether or not he will visit her on this special holiday.  Many women sit desperately by the phone, being grateful to receive even a phone call from the man they are involved with.   

Here is the reality: Even if a man is the most notorious player (Mr. Married Bachelor), he knows that he is expected to plant himself at home, at the table with his “legitimate” wife and their children when dinner is served.  With this in mind, he works overtime to develop a plan to skillfully maneuver and manipulate his way to do a quick “stop-by” the homes of his other “additional” women throughout the day.  In a nutshell, he devises a deceitful plan of action to include a full day of three meals and side dish.   

Here’s the plan: Keep in mind that the motive of the meal plan, the make-shift dinners throughout the day, of this married bachelor stud is to satisfy and keep his various women in his stable with the notion that, “You mean so much to me, that I’ve made every effort to spend some time with you on this special day.”  Let us peek into this extreme, yet real case of how Mr. Married Bachelor’s schedule plays out on a sacred Christmas day: 5

5:00 am - He rises early Christmas morning, at the crack of dawn, sneaks out of bed and locks himself in the bathroom, turns on the faucet to drown out the sound of his phone calls, as he whispers romantic sweet words and holiday cheers to his other women.  Their responses are similar:  “Baby, if you really love me like you say, you would come by and spend some time with me, today of all days.”   

6:00 am - Mr. Married Bachelor informs his wife, “Honey, I won’t be going to early church mass with you and the children this morning because I have an upset stomach.  Please pray for me in church.  I’m going to rest up a bit and then stop by my mother’s to deliver the gift I bought for her, and quickly stop by to see Uncle Joe and Aunt Lucy, but I will be home long before dinner.  

7:00 am – When wife and children leave for early morning church mass, Mr. Married Bachelor gets dressed at marathon speed and pops by the house of Woman #1for an early morning visit.  He does not bother to call to inform her that he is on his way because he knows his women are always waiting and available for him. When he arrives she is so happy to see him, that they have hot sex and she makes him a special Christmas breakfast in bed. 

9:00 am- As soon as he burps and his food digests, Mr. Married Bachelor tells her that he has to go his mother’s house, gets dress rapidly, kisses his mistress passionately, and ventures off to his next woman’s house. 

9:15 am – Upon arrival at the home of Woman #2, without taking a shower to wash off the sex from the first, he eagerly plunges into the arms and body of his awaiting mistress.  When their sexual romp is completed, she makes him a light Christmas brunch, which he rapidly devours as he dresses and exits at 10:45 am, leaving her with the promise, “I’ll call you later from my mother’s house.” 

11:00 am – He reaches the apartment of Women #3—exhausted!  He is almost falling asleep as she is opening the door.  She is so excited to see him that she will take him asleep or awake—just any way she can get him to spend some time with her.  They exchange a quick kiss and make their way to the bedroom, as he literally drops asleep across her bed, fully clothed.  After deeply sleeping and snoring for about an hour and a half, he is awaken by the delicious smelling Christmas lunch she has prepared especially for him.  He eats the meal, tells her what a good cook she is, have concentrated 15-minute sex session with her, takes a quick shower to refresh, and then dashes out at 1:15 pm as he tells her he’s late for his mother’s house. 

1:30 pm – Mr. Married Bachelor arrives at Woman #4—the newest one who he has only been seeing for about three weeks.  She is elated that her new man popped by to surprise her on Christmas day and they have a 45-minute love-making romp—again, he is extremely exhausted—but he spends an additional 45 minutes talking with her and sharing a Christmas toast of champagne and a slice of  store bought apple pie.  He tells her he will call her later from his mother’s house as she walks him to the door at 3:00 pm. 

3:15 pm – When Mr. Married Bachelor finally arrives at his mother’s house, she notices that he looks a wreck, “Son, are you alright, you look worn out and tired.”  His response, “Ma, I’ve been working overtime lately and I feel a little weak.”  She makes him some hot tea, as he relaxes on the couch.  Then Aunt Lucy, Uncle Joe and some other cousins comes by.  They all share family conversation as he quickly takes a bite of Mama’s roasted chicken and leaves an hour later to go home to his wife (who doesn’t get along with Mama at all).   

 4:30 pm – Mr. Married Bachelor arrives home and tells his wife that when her arrived at his mother’s house, she made him tea for his upset stomach, then he fell asleep, and later some other relatives came by.  He assures his wife that as soon as he felt better, he and came home to spend the rest of the day with his “loving family,” as he heads to the bathroom to take a shower.   

5:00 pm – Christmas dinner is served at his home with wife and children.   They all enjoy the family meal together.  He asks about church service and tells them how much he missed them throughout the day.  They watch a family movie together and later in the evening, after taking a quick bathroom break to telephone and whisper a one minute “I love you” to all of his women, Mr. Married Bachelor finally settles in for the night.  He makes passionate love to his faithful wife, and just before rolling over to fall asleep he confides, “Honey, you are so good in bed, that you always knock me out.”  And, he is indeed out for the night!        

Here’s the solution: Let’s be totally honest here, Mr. Married Bachelor is like a bull, roaming around the cow pasture to make sure that he keeps his women in tow. Ouch!  I know that some of you will get mad reading this, but this is an honest wake-up call for you.  You deserve so much better than settling for a part-time Lover-man who has you throwing away your self-worth and dignity for two hours of sex and company on Christmas day.  Make it your New Year’s resolution to drop this loser and choose a champion who will spend the whole day and a life-time with you, and only you!