Premarital Counseling for a Lasting Marriage

Some might think that premarital counseling will be a waste of time. It is true that just because you get counsel before getting married you will not necessarily have a lasting marriage. Depending on whom you go to for counsel, it could help you, especially in those first years when you are adapting to each other. If you get married in a church or have a minister doing the ceremony, you may be required to have some counsel. There are several things to think about as you get counsel. You should make sure to be completely honest as you go through studies or books privately with your spouse to be. It is important to be able to be open with your husband or wife. This is the time to start being this way. If you find that you cannot be honest and open with him or her, then this is the time to make some important decisions and perhaps not get married. As you go into premarital counseling, it is important to also consider doing some study on your own. There are so many books available today, but it is important to make sure that the books you read are in line with a proper world-view. The same is important when you choose the individual who will be doing the premarital counseling. Make sure that they are also in line with your beliefs about marriage. Not everyone has the same view of marriage as you. Sometimes you might learn something new about what it means to be married that you can integrate into your worldview. It is important to remember that marriage is not about you, but it is actually also about your husband or wife to be. If you realize that marriage is not about you as much as it is about pleasing your husband or wife then you will likely have a much longer lasting marriage than if you think it is all about pleasing yourself. Premarital counseling can teach you things like this, as can books. The main thing is that you learn things to integrate into your future marriage. Whether or not you agree with the variety of beliefs that are out there about marriage, take the time to get counsel to see what you can learn from it. In the end, learning about these beliefs will likely only help you. If you are not required to have premarital counseling, you might be wise to seek out a counselor to help you anyway. It might prevent you from having to have counsel during your marriage.