The Woman's Survival Guide To Football Season

The long wait is finally over, the months of our husbands laying around whining about how many days until football season have come to an end.  Sure, we play this time of year as though we hate it and we can’t stand all the time that our husbands and boyfriends spend with the guys and away from us, but deep down we love football season.  Granted, being sure to appear like a caring lover is key to a successful female football season, but this can be accomplished with a few simple steps.  In this article, I will explain how women can navigate football season without frustration and even get a few perks if they know how to time things correctly. 

That’s right, this article is not just about learning to enjoy the time spent without your boyfriends and husbands, but actually about how you can take advantage of the male mentality and make this football season one that you will never forget.  The process is actually rather easy, as men are not complicated individuals.  But to do this correctly you must follow a few steps that will result in guaranteed enjoyment.

To begin with, you must at least begin to show the signs of interest in football and the games.  This can be accomplished by asking while you are making dinner (so you do not have to pay attention to the answer) or you can take it even farther and ask that he explain the game to you a bit more.  Asking a man to discuss his football knowledge will likely result in a long winded explanation about how they are not all just running into one pile, that there is some sort of play going on.  Blah, Blah, Blah.  But the point is to give them the appearance of interest.  The second thing you need to do is prepare to have small appetizers ready for the guys during the games.  This may sound silly, but how hard is it to throw a few frozen appetizers into the oven, the result in a man’s head is “wow, she is into this stuff.” 

This is the only impression that matters.  Your man will soon be so deep into the game that you can do whatever it is that you want, all day Saturday or Sunday, depending on what type of football it is that your husband watches.  The next part of your objective is all about the timing.  Say you want to go to the store to pick up that wrinkle cream you have wanted, or you want to go online to purchase the eye gel you have been reading about.  You simply need to notify your man during a time when he is sure to not want to pay attention to you.  This is usually good during the beginning of the game, but not too early, and not too late either.  You want the game to be new enough that he is still yelling at the screen, but the outcome of the game is not decided yet. 

By putting the food down on the table in front of the guys during this time and then announcing that you are going to be “getting out of the guys way and run to the store to grab those items that we talked about” you will get the response you are looking for.  Number one, he is unlikely to be listening as he is watching the game, number two he does not pay attention to the items “we talk about” even if you do talk about them, preferring to veto it at the point of purchase.  Three, there are usually other guys watching the game as well that would be inconvenienced by having to have this discussion, so your man will not follow up.  Just a quick kiss and you are off to a day of shopping, lunch with the girls and making that purchase that you have been waiting for, all while your man is happily watching games.  It’s time to stop hating football season and see it as the opportunity that it is.  If wrinkle creams are your purchase of choice or if you have been eyeing those shoes, either way your best chance is to use the football distraction and get your way.  Remember football season does not last all year, so take advantage while it lasts.  Who knows, maybe next year you too will be counting down the days till football season.