Married and Cheating: The Unending Game of Infidelity

Apr 3
07:43

2024

Daryl Campbell

Daryl Campbell

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In the intricate dance of marriage, partners often enter with a pledge of fidelity and a belief in mutual commitment. Yet, the harsh reality reveals a different picture for many couples. Infidelity remains a persistent issue, with approximately 50% of spouses admitting to cheating at least once, according to the American Association for Marriage and Family Therapy. The motives behind such betrayals vary, ranging from emotional dissatisfaction to the thrill of the chase. This article delves into the complex reasons why some married individuals, particularly those labeled as 'players,' continue to engage in extramarital affairs, despite the vows they've taken.

The Allure of Attraction and the Ego's Role

It's human nature to enjoy feeling desired,Married and Cheating: The Unending Game of Infidelity Articles and this is especially true for those with a strong ego. When someone outside of a committed relationship expresses attraction, it can be a significant ego boost. For the player, this is not merely a moment of flattery to be brushed aside; it's an opportunity for action. The thrill of flirtation often escalates into a pursuit of conquest. The player's ego is fueled by each new romantic victory, perpetuating a cycle of infidelity.

The Fear of Losing One's Charm

For some, the transition from single life to marriage brings about a fear of losing their allure or 'touch.' The player may seek to validate their desirability by proving they can still attract others, even after marriage. This fear can be relentless, resurfacing periodically and driving the individual back into the arms of someone new, in a never-ending quest for reassurance.

The Art of Deception: The Slick Operator

Players adept at deception may have never truly abandoned their philandering ways. Instead, they've become skilled at creating an illusion of fidelity. The modern convenience of cell phones has made it easier for cheating spouses to coordinate their extramarital activities while keeping tabs on their partner's movements. The goal for these individuals is not just to indulge in forbidden pleasures but to maintain a facade that allows them to have it all.

The Challenge of Change for the Habitual Player

While not all players are incapable of change, many find it difficult to abandon their adulterous habits. The combination of ego and routine can be a formidable force, and without a genuine commitment to their spouse and the relationship, the player may never truly exit the game.

The Statistics Behind Infidelity

  • According to the American Association for Marriage and Family Therapy, national surveys indicate that 15% of married women and 25% of married men have had extramarital affairs.
  • The General Social Survey at the University of Chicago has found that 20% of men and 13% of women reported having sex with someone other than their spouse while married.
  • A study published in the Journal of Marriage and Family suggests that infidelity in the United States is on the rise, particularly among older adults.

Understanding the Impact

Infidelity can have a profound impact on marriages, leading to emotional distress, loss of trust, and often divorce. It's essential for couples to communicate openly and address issues that may lead to infidelity. For those struggling with a partner's infidelity, seeking professional help from a licensed therapist can be a crucial step in healing and moving forward.

For more information on the dynamics of infidelity and marriage, readers can explore resources provided by the American Association for Marriage and Family Therapy (AAMFT) and the Institute for Family Studies (IFS).

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