Life is Like a Fan

Life is like a fan on a hot day – behind it you’re missing out, but in front you feel the advantage. Picture a fan. When you turn it on, air is sucked from behind and propelled out the front. On a hot day, you want to be sitting in front of the fan where there is a cool breeze, rather than behind the fan where things get increasingly hot and uncomfortable.

Life is synonymous with the fan in terms of where we find ourselves, in front or behind. The longer we stand behind it, the more anxious, disempowered, and restricted we feel – a state in which it is nearly impossible to grow. However, when we are able to work our way around to stand in front the fan, everything seems to come together for us, and we are propelled forward just like the air – a natural place to grow. As we move forward, we feel energized, empowered, and engaged to create personal prosperity.

What Keeps Us Behind the Fan?

We allow our personal or professional limitations to control us. Often they are perceived rather than actual limitations. We keep ourselves behind the fan, beating up on ourselves for one reason or another, not permitting ourselves to move forward. The longer we stay behind the fan, the harder it is to move to the front. Surviving behind the fan requires energy that is tenfold to that of being in front because it only continues to get harder to avoid the blades. Think about a time you told a lie, for instance. Have you noticed how much effort it takes to prevent getting caught? You cover all your bases, maybe make up alibis, and try to stay one step ahead of the truth. That is exactly what it is like fighting to keep away from the fan blades from behind the fan – constant work, constant efforts to remain stationary to avoid a downward spiral.

Remember the first time you did something new, such as riding a bike or surfing the net? You invested yourself in it, fumbling and bumbling around in the beginning, only to find that after some practice and experience in your new pursuit you were able to surpass your expectations. You no longer skin your knees, or you now realize that when you search the term “Mickey Mouse,” you could get a website detailing how to buy a used car and not just the Disney home page. In the process, you moved to the front of the fan, where we enjoy the ride as we attempt to create magnificent things in our lives. Life is breezy and fruitful when we focus on our learning and development, engage in new and exciting pursuits, and understand that there is no such thing as failure as long as we learn from our experiences.

How Do You Get in front of the Fan?

The first step is to begin a path towards creating positive outcomes in your life and to truly believe you can achieve them. The next step will require you to apply yourself to making some personal changes in your life so that you can shift your position in relation to the fan, or life.

Personal Placement

One strategy – being in the right place at the right time – does not occur just by luck. It can also happen by strategically placing yourself in the line of opportunities. If you desire a certain thing in your life, you have to be there to collect your dreams; otherwise, they will float by. For example, if you are in search of a partner but you are not socializing outside of your home, your chances of meeting someone to fall in love with are extremely low. However, if you circulate and meet people, attend singles’ events, and date, your chances of meeting that special person increase. Essentially, you are marketing yourself. By doing so you are making sure that your information is in the right place at the right time, and people think of you first.

I took this approach at the ripe age of 23, when I felt that my services could benefit corporations. I started to let the most exclusive organization of corporations, the Young Presidents’ Organization (YPO), know that my services were available. Within one year, my local YPO chapter came to me with an issue they were facing. I solved it beyond their expectations and continue to work with them annually. If I had not deliberately introduced myself to that organization, I doubt that such a mutually beneficial working relationship would have developed so quickly.

Personally place yourself into areas in your life where you sit behind the fan but feel that you would like to be on the other side. If you would like to be more physically active, get a membership at a local gym and go there daily. By being there, you will absorb the motivation of the people there and use it towards improving your own health. Maybe the area where you sit behind the fan is your love life. Go out and take a chance on meeting someone new. Let your friends know that you would like to meet someone, and go out on a blind date. You never know. Visit or organize a singles’ night at the grocery store and do your shopping then.

Regardless of what you desire in your life, find a way to associate yourself with the people or activities that you wish to be involved with. Through your association, your opportunity will eventually present itself. It is up to you to feel the breeze and grasp your dream using it to propel you forward to great things.

Practice Winning

Winning may not be everything, but it certainly has merits! Winning helps move us forward by generating the breeze that gives our prosperity momentum. When we are situated behind the fan, the breeze is nonexistent because we don’t necessarily have, celebrate, or plan for achievements. So the thing to do is set a winning course. Life is full of opportunities to win. Unfortunately, we often feel that the only things worth winning are the “big” things. We wait to win the lottery, fall madly in love, or get that promotion at work. All the while, we miss the little triumphs, which in real life accumulate to make the ultimate victory.

For example, do you want to lose weight? First set a goal to reduce the fat intake in your diet and celebrate your good choices. When you are at a fast-food restaurant, order a vegetable pita instead of the greasy breaded chicken sandwich. Then celebrate the good choice by doing a little jig in the line (if you’re an extrovert), or celebrate another more discrete way. Your celebration must be immediate and equal to the effort you invest. You have just won!

Maybe you want to learn to play the guitar. Start by researching the best place to take lessons. Then call and make an appointment. Buy, rent, or borrow a guitar. Practice the techniques your instructor teaches for 10 minutes a day. In time you will learn to play all your favorite music! The examples of small triumphs are endless. The trick is to see a path to your big win in small progressive stages and to celebrate those stages with small rewards. You will eventually reach that vision and embrace the prize you set out for!

Effective Disposal

How bogged down do you feel with all the immediate issues of everyday life, such as taking the kids to Little League, working on a report your boss is eagerly awaiting, and making the mortgage payments? These are usually manageable issues that only occasionally may cause you to lose perspective. What about other stresses that we carry with us?

In my presentations, I often invite two volunteers to enforce this point. I ask one to hold a heavy load of hardcover books. Each book represents an issue in life they have not yet dealt with. For example, one book represents an unhealthy diet, another may be feelings toward a person who hurt them, another is a gambling or drinking addiction, and another is anxiety about body image. We all carry such “books” with us everywhere we go, and they continue to stack up, making it harder and harder to succeed.

The second volunteer carries a piece of paper for every book I give the first volunteer. Each piece of paper represents an executive summary, which I’ll explain in a moment, of those same issues. We should aspire to distill our major issues into executive summaries as learning tools for future reference. Imagine how much easier it is to do jumping jacks, run a race, or live a full life while holding 25 pieces of paper rather than 25 encyclopedias!

Start to dispose of the full heft of your issues and write the executive summaries. This pursuit may take the form of professional counseling or be as informal as personal exploration and reflection. Regardless of the vehicle you choose, you need to compose the executive summaries and dispose of the encyclopedia versions. How you do this becomes easier with practice. Writing executive summaries is much like winning – you become an expert with enough practice. The first step is to identify honestly the most effective way to process an issue: with professional help or on your own.

For instance, I am a survivor of sexual abuse. I spent many years dealing with it personally only to realize that I required professional help. In a few short sessions, I was able to put down my encyclopedia version and carry my executive summary. If you find that you are unable to put down the encyclopedia, in other words, if the issue constantly affects you in serious ways and no amount of talking or writing about it alleviates the affects, this is a good candidate for professional help.

If, on the other hand, you choose to tackle an issue on your own, here are some reactive solutions that I have found effective in making executive summaries.

Issue Toss

Write in chalk the issue that you are struggling with on a medium-size rock. Take that rock to the ocean or a lakeshore, if you’re not already there to find your rock. Sit with the rock and think about that issue in its entirety. Direct your thoughts about that issue onto the rock. See it and feel your energy going into the rock. Then in one extremely cathartic expression, pitch the rock as far as you can into the body of water. Feel free to scream; it is the expression of what is inside you that is important. With the hurling rock goes your issue. Believe it and commit to it.

Letter Campaign

Write a letter to the person, place, or thing that is causing your difficult issue. Write a descriptive letter that allows you to vent in Technicolor. Express anything and everything that you want about that issue in your letter. Once you have finished your letter, put it in an envelope. By placing the letter in the envelope, you are putting the issue there, too. Then take the letter along with a pack of matches to your kitchen sink and light it on fire! Say good-bye to the issue.

Birthday Suit Dance

I like to dance or vacuum around the house naked when I am extremely frustrated (and alone). As weird as that may sound, it really works to clear my mind – much to my dog’s dismay every time I do it. I crank the tunes, usually classical or folk rock, and strip down to my birthday suit. I dance around or haul out the vacuum and cruise around the house. I end up in a fit of laughter, which usually rids me of my frustration so that I have either thwarted an encyclopedia-size burden, or I can continue to work towards an executive summary of an existing issue.

Toys

My wife, Laurie, and I each have a Nerf gun and a Super Soaker. We call them the marriage counselors. When are feeling frustrated or upset with one another, we grab the toys and chase each other around the house. (We recently acquired the Super Soakers for those anxiety-filled moments in the summer, so we can take the “therapy” outside.) Whether we use the Super Soakers or the Nerf guns, we always make up and leave the frustration behind.

Road Rage Emergency Kit

I visit many of the largest cities annually. I have an emergency kit that I carry for times of traffic tie-ups. I feel the stress of traffic easily because of where I live – turn left from the middle of nowhere! The only traffic jams in my home community occur when two friends stop their cars in the middle of the road to chat. When that happens, I just kick back and wait. (I waited 10 minutes once.) To say the least, I am not used to traffic, so I carry my road rage emergency kit – a red clown nose, my harmonica, and some Maritime folk music. When the stress gets to me, I don the clown nose, crank the tunes, and follow along with my harmonica! Usually, I am able to bolster my spirits as well as those of the people around me in other cars! I guess everyone loves a clown.

Seek to Prevent New Issues, Too

I also have a number of more proactive measures to ensure that I exercise opportunities to help prevent new issues. Here are some strategies that I have found very useful.

Arnold’s Workout

I work out regularly to manage my stress levels. I visit the gym about four times a week and walk about half an hour every day with my wife and our dog. This healthy activity makes me feel good about myself, how I look, and my lifestyle. If you don’t yet exercise on a regular basis, try it for a few days. You will be amazed at the positive energy you can generate – you’ll turn on those endorphins. (If you do work out, you know what I’m talking about!) Your workout can be as simple as a ten-minute walk on weekdays after supper or as extensive as training like an elite athlete. Regardless of the workout you desire in the future, start small and work in sustainable steps to meet your goals. Remember that exercise need not be in the traditional athletic arena either. Yoga and Tai Chi are becoming extremely popular as physically strenuous but meditative forms of exercise. Talk to your doctor about what program is best for you.

Making Time

Within a healthy marital or family relationship one of the most important things to do is spend time together. My wife and I believe and practice this. Every night before supper, we turn on some soft music, light some candles, and share in a glass or two of red wine. Making time to sit and be together is vital to a healthy relationship; even if we are not talking, we are together. Other times we play together. We play games of cards and even Battleship and cherish that time together. We practice this when I am on the road, too. I will call Laurie every night and we will talk for at least an hour, sometimes about nothing in particular. (Thank goodness for competitive long-distance plans!) By making time for one another, we focus on creating positive experiences and developing our relationship, even when life gets really busy.

Simplify Your Life

Take the time to look at your day’s schedule and at what things you do over and over. Examine, for instance, your bathroom routine in the morning. Mine is super simple: I shave, shower, apply deodorant, and brush my hair and teeth. Devise ways to simplify routines. By streamlining “have to dos,” you shave time off of your daily chores through your efficiency. This approach can include work, too. When you arrive and before you leave work, take 10 minutes to plan/review your day. It is a simple thing but a real time-saver.

Know your Day

There are particular times of day that we are better prepared to do certain things. For example, the morning may be your best creative time. So don’t waste your creative energy opening snail mail; write instead! Open your mail after lunch if that is when your concentration and energy wane, and deal with those phone calls you’ve been putting off. Also, don’t burn yourself out at your job so that you can’t enjoy life outside of work. Learn to create balance, and use your hours of high energy and low energy for appropriate activities. Map out your day and listen to your body over a week to see what works best for you.

“Where’s the Beef?”

Remember that television ad? I loved it. Two older women at a burger place order burgers. The server throws down tiny beef patties on oversize buns in front of them. One of these women in a surprisingly stern and raspy voice exclaims, “Where’s the beef?” Part of her point then remains valid: know what you are putting into your body.

I am just beginning to appreciate the complexity of this. I used to eat fairly healthy, as little fat as possible without compromising the occasional french fries. (I’m only human!) Now I am learning that healthy eating is more involved than just eating low fat. The foods that we eat create different responses in our bodies, based on the form in which they store energy. Each form of energy is important based on your lifestyle and the time of day. Speak with a nutritionist to come up with an eating plan that best suits your body type, level of activity, and daily nutritional needs.

Let the Sunshine In

Make sure that you spend some time every day doing something that you enjoy; commit to that as if it were a hobby. In addition to practising your hobby at home, inject some fun into your workplace. My office is often mistaken for a playroom, which can be troubling because we don’t have kids, yet! Right now, from where I am sitting I can see a Slinky, three water guns, building blocks, three musical instruments, several types of balls, a retro frog game, a box of Lego, a yo-yo, and lots of my own folk art. This creative environment energizes me and inspires me in my work.

I love being outdoors, so I also make sure that my office has as much natural light as possible, or Chi as it is called in Eastern philosophy. This light energy is very motivational. Open your blinds and let the sunshine in! If you spend the majority of your time in a room with poor natural lighting, visit your local lighting store and inquire about full-spectrum lighting. These lights produce the same natural properties that we get from the sun, and they have shown in laboratory studies to improve concentration and mood as well as reduce cavities, to name just a few benefits. (To find out more visit www.eagledistrib.com. They sell them factory direct!)

By working with these proactive solutions, you will combat any urge to accept a new encyclopedia. Rather, these management strategies will help you address small issues before they become overwhelming. These techniques will also help you unload some of the encyclopedias that you are carrying right now and enable you to write your own executive summaries, sending you on your path to a prosperous life.

Personal Programming

If you can conceive it, you can achieve it! A strong ability to practice creating a vision of where you wish to be is a core competency for achieving personal prosperity. Learn to program your thoughts (which govern your actions) with messages and images of your prosperity. Post pictures of goals you have set for your life, write a check for an obscene amount of money that you will cash one day, or carry reminders of your vision with you daily.

Start today by halting negative self-talk. Stop looking at yourself and saying, “I am so fat,” or, “I am never going to get ahead in this job.” These statements will create your limits. Instead of setting limits, create opportunities by programming your mind and thus your actions with affirmations. Look at the things that could be improved in your life and turn them from the negative to the positive. For example, instead of saying, “I’m never going to get ahead in this job,” say to yourself, “With every day I go to work I am one day closer to my promotion.” Phrase your statements in such a way that they are in the present tense, they are not limiting or self-defeating, and they suggest a positive outcome.

Start believing in yourself and your inherent make-up will return the favor. Look within yourself and begin to know that you are a great person. One of the ways that you can really see this is to trace the outline of your body on a huge piece of paper and start to label the good things about yourself, such as beautiful eyes, strong hands, sense of humor, belief in a greater spirit, and so on. Once you start seeing the great things about yourself, more great things will emerge. This is another way to get in front of the fan and turn on those endorphins.

Believing in yourself is vital. Equally important is having others who believe in you. Create a ring of people around you who believe in you and will help guide you towards championing your personal prosperity. The more people who think positively about you, the more positive things will happen for you. For now, start to give people reasons to think positively about you by doing little things for others. Bring a co-worker a cup of coffee when you get one for yourself. Hold the door open for people entering the same building as you. Smile and say “hi” to people. Speak in a positive tone to others, whether they are wait staff at a restaurant, a client on the phone, your children or spouse, or any other person you meet. By being positive and respectful, people will think positively of you, which ultimately builds the positive energy and power in your favor. In addition to the everyday things, seek mentor and apprentice relationships. Either way, people will be thinking well of you. When people think well of you, you will move to the front of the fan, where life’s breeze will propel you forward in growth and achievement!