Maybe I Can Drive That Car

"Maybe I Can Drive That Car"

-Getting in and driving your recovery vehicle.

An Alcohol and Drug Addiction Survival Kit

for alcoholics, addicts, professionals, and normies…
by Steve J. Murray, NI-COR President and Founder



Introduction

This book is not about using fifty cent words. I could expound upon the extrapolation of the eclectic within the dialectic- but I would lose most of you, including myself. This book is about real life, real words, and real recovery. Recovery is like learning to drive for the first time. In the beginning we are nervous, hesitant, and make all kinds of errors. We over steer, under steer, hit the brakes too hard, punch the accelerator, run over curbs, scare little old ladies off the sidewalks, and generally don’t think we have done so well. What appears to be a failure is really the start of what will become a skilled driver- one that will, through practice, be a life of amazing exploration, growth, and peace. Being unsure and unsteady is all normal; especially in the beginning. Being scared behind the wheel is alright. Sometimes we are growing, but don’t realize it because of the way we are feeling. On the positive side, one benefit of this period is the fact that you will probably not wreck the car because of your heightened sense of awareness- it is when we get too confident in our driving abilities that caution is abandoned, and then we wreck the car because of our complacency. To be a good driver, you must practice, practice, practice. To be good at recovery, you must practice, practice, practice. This book will teach you how to live life free of alcoholism and drug addiction. Hence we begin our analogy of driving and recovery.

Chapter One- Alcoholism

Are you an alcoholic? Think about the times you were behind the wheel, or as a passenger in a vehicle while intoxicated. Pretty scary huh? I can remember driving one time and my friend asked me if I was okay to drive. I replied with, “I can’t see the windshield.”

We all have our tales of drinking and lived to tell about them. But are we really living. The following chapter will deal mostly with the tales that should have been recognized as insane behaviors- clues to a problem that were ignored.
How can you be fully functional and yet be in a blackout?

How many have driven from one place to another, only to realize that they can’t remember the last four or five blocks. Did we run a red light? Perhaps we cut someone off, or driven too fast. So now we realize that it is possible to be fully functional, but not remember a thing about our actions. Imagine driving for three or four days and feeling the same way as you did that time you drove four blocks and can’t remember. This is what it is like in a blackout. The person is fully functional, but comes out of the blackout not remembering what they did, or where they went. I know of one habitual blackout drinker who would come out of his blackouts in a different part of the country. Imagine starting out drinking in Arizona, and then waking up in Florida three days later. Imagine not knowing how you got there, or whose path you crossed, what you did and said. Not to mention if you committed a crime along the way.

How can I be an alcoholic when I work, play, and function in society without any problems?

Let’s say your driving down the road, fully in control of your vehicle, when all of a sudden the tire blows out. You are not prepared for this, and you hit the brakes. The car swerves and hits another vehicle. You come to a stop. There were no injuries to your wife, kids, or the other driver. You could say that all’s well because you didn’t hurt anyone. But if we are honest about it, you did damage to your car and the other persons car. They will be without a car for a while. You will be without a car for a while. Think about all that will be affected by the accident. You will, and your family will, have to make major adjustments to their life. The other driver will have to make major changes also. In addition to this, there will be much apprehension every time the wife, kids, co-worker and others get into a car that your in control of. The stress alone will affect everybody around you- yet you maintain to yourself and everybody else, that you are in control and there is nothing to fear. In your mind you are right. Put this scenario into play about your drinking. Is it not the same? You feel fully functional, but yet when a problem arises you don’t react the right way and there is damage done- although in your mind you may feel you handled the situation correctly. Just look around you, and into the faces of those you love, and you will see a different perspective. I remember someone saying, “I want to die peacefully, the way my granddad did, not like the others in the car who were all screaming hysterically.”








Maybe I Can Drive That Car / Alcohol and Drug Addiction Survival Kit are NI-COR TM / Copyright © 2003 NI-COR. All rights reserved.