Review: Wedded to the Game: The Real Lives Of NFL Women

ISBN: 0803286252

The following review was contributed by: NORM GOLDMAN:Editor of Bookpleasures. CLICK TO VIEW Norm Goldman's Reviews

First time author and wife of John Morton, an ex- NFL player and now coach,Shannon O’Toole candidly exposes her thoughts and perceptions of what it is liketo be married to a professional football player or coach.

O’Toole, who holds a master's degree in sociology, bases much of her assessmentson a questionnaire that she anonymously sent to one hundred and fifty wives ofNFL players and coaches. She received seventy five responses and of these shechose thirty to interview more in depth. These women range in age from theirearly twenties to their mid-sixties and come from diverse educational and ethnicbackgrounds. Wedded to the Game: The Real Lives Of NFL Women is a broad overviewas well as a recording and synthesis of O’Toole’s findings that make for somevery interesting and sometimes surprising data.

Divided into ten chapters, O’Toole addresses such concerns as the insecurity ofbeing a wife of a player or coach whose career can be over in a flash, or theendless number of relocations that most of the players have to endure duringtheir career. A full chapter is devoted to domestic violence and theineffectiveness of the NFL in dealing with the problem. Included in this samechapter is the temptation to indulge in extra-marital affairs and a questioningif it is more prevalent than in any other profession or occupation.

The misconception that everyone employed by the sport is ultra-rich is thoroughlyexamined with some surprising revelations. Much ink is given to exploring familyrelationships, particularly where couples live a schizophrenic existence in thatonce the season begins some wives hardly see their spouses. As the authorstates, “some women, particularly coaches' wives, never get over thedifficulties and loneliness the football season brings, and they becomeincreasingly bitter and hostile." Moreover, wives have to take on the role ofsupermoms or single moms, wherein she becomes one hundred percent responsiblefor their physical, educational, and emotional well-being of the couple'schildren.

Readers also receive a realistic exposé of how difficult it is to break into theNFL and the daily routines of NFL players and coaches that are not as glamorousas the media would like to have us believe.

Another misconception that the author candidly talks about is the matter of freetickets to the games. As mentioned, players and coaches for the most part arerequired to pay for their tickets, and the tickets that they do receive fortheir immediate family are not exactly in the best sections of the stadium.

O'Toole is not afraid to touch on some very sensitive issues and what emerges isa poignant and gripping sketch of a better understanding of the complex lives ofspouses of NFL players and coaches that are very often ignored by the media.