Did you know that Match.com boasts around twelve million members, but only about one million of those have actually paid for a subscription? This discrepancy leads to one of the most frequently asked questions from online daters: "Why don't they answer my emails?" The answer often lies in the fact that many users are simply not willing to pay for the service.
Online dating can be a frustrating experience, especially when you send out numerous first-contact emails and receive no responses. A response rate of 30% to initial emails is considered good in the online dating world. However, on platforms like Match.com, you can create a profile for free, but you need to pay to send or respond to messages. This means that a significant portion of the profiles you see are from users who haven't paid for the service and therefore can't communicate with you.
You can't distinguish between paying members and freeloaders just by looking at their profiles. Those who haven't paid can't send or respond to messages, which means that many of the profiles you are scrutinizing belong to people who are too cheap to pay less than a dollar a day to communicate. This could explain why only about 30% of people respond to your messages—they're the ones who have paid for the service.
I currently live in Mississippi with my new husband Drew, but I'm originally from Maine. I still own a house on a beautiful island in the mid-coast area, so I visit once or twice a year. Every spring, after the snow melts, the debris accumulated over the winter along the roadsides gets exposed. Along with tulips and daffodils, "For Sale" signs also start to appear.
For years, I wondered why so many houses went up for sale every spring. It seemed like every other house was on the market. Finally, someone explained that many locals put up "For Sale" signs as a sort of sport. They know that summer tourists, who often have distorted ideas about property values, are coming. The locals ask for inflated prices to see if anyone will bite. If they catch a rich buyer, they might fund their retirement. If not, they stay in their house and try again next year. This is a form of gold digging.
Believe it or not, many people on dating sites are doing something similar. They put up their "For Sale" sign with their profile, appearing to be seriously "in the market" for a partner. In reality, they have an over-inflated idea of what they can get and are waiting to see if someone will bite. These people are not seriously looking for a relationship; they are waiting for a jackpot.
In the online dating world, this is deceptive advertising at its worst. The reader has no way of knowing if the person they are interested in is serious and a paid-up member or not. The only people who can send emails on these sites are those who have paid. All others are freeloading teases.
If you are considering online dating or are already on a site or two, pay your dues like an adult. Contribute to the energy and integrity of this valuable resource for singles. If there's ever a time to "put your money where your mouth is," this is it. If you're serious about finding a relationship, pay up. If you're not serious, stay out of the game.
By understanding the dynamics of online dating and the importance of paying for the service, you can navigate the world of cyber romance more effectively and increase your chances of finding a meaningful connection.
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