It is the most important job we will do in our life. Isn't it about time that we put as much energy into raising our children as we do keeping up with the Jones's?
Is there any work harder, more satisfying, aggravating, bewildering and important than raising kids? I think not. It's a huge, long-term, scary project, and worth thinking about a good deal. I read somewhere that we only prepare for what we think is important, so let's prepare for this most important endeavor. Even if you're already in the middle of the project, there are still many things you can do to help your kids grow up well, and here are some of them.
Love your children. Unconditionally, selflessly, forever. Tell them often and make sure they believe it with all their hearts. Wise old Solomon said “love covers a multitude of sins”, and love will make up for a lot of parenting mistakes!
Put family first. You only get to influence your babies for fifteen to twenty years. Slide other all-consuming projects to the back burner until your children are successfully launched. You can't afford to neglect them while you get your fancy career off the ground. If you do, you'll regret it forever.
Don't get divorced. Work as hard as you must to grow a good marriage. Some exceptions apply, of course, but please be determined to make it work. Look at the stats on two parent families and successful children.
Put the Jones last. Don't keep looking at what clothes, toys, schools, activities, etc. ad nauseum your neighbors are providing for (or inflicting on) their children. Your ego and competitive spirit mustn't affect the decisions you make about what will be best for your offspring.
Church is good. Life is more than food and clothing. Help your kids see the bigger picture, the deeper meaning, celebrate the miracle of existing at all, develop gratitude for the abundant beauty and blessings all around them.
Careful about their education, both intellectual and moral. It's your responsibility, not Uncle Sam's. Go to whatever lengths necessary to make sure your children can read and write and think well. Be bravely counter-cultural wherever necessary. Discourage obsession with dating and romance. Protect your vulnerable children from the most damaging aspects of our popular culture, but pick your battles carefully. Hair grows back. Brain cells don't.
Limit TV and internet use. No kid needs a TV in his room. And it's rarely advisable to allow an internet capable computer in a child's room. Keep the entertainment machinery in family areas, and supervise its use way more than your kids want you to.
Provide lots of good books. Read to them, starting before they're born, and for as many years as they will let you. Make them do some work (to earn money, and as an expected part of family life), and give them lots of free time to play.
Take it one day at a time. Love and teach them well today. Then try again tomorrow.
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