Single Parenting Advice and Tips

#1 Deal with the circumstances surrounding your new status.If the situation that led to your becoming a single parent is less than favorable, you must deal with the negative “stuff” carefully to minimize the impact on your child.  Try to be very careful about speaking negatively in front of your child or children and remember to keep adult matters private.  If you are having a tough time dealing with the circumstances yourself, try to talk to someone you trust or go to a professional for some counseling.#2 Look at the situation positively.It is easy to see yourself as “stuck with the kids” and despair in the tragedy of suddenly being a single parent.  Be careful not to let yourself fall into this mindset.  Look at single parenting as a good thing.  Think of how much fun you’ll be able to have with your child all to yourself.  Make a list of ten good things about being able to raise your child all on your own.  Think about how you’ll be able to make all the decisions concerning the raising of your child without having to compromise with another person.  Even when things get difficult, stay positive and focus on the rewards.#3 Create your single-income budget.Create a new budget based on all income including money paid to your for your work, alimony, child support (if any) etcetera.  Make a list of expenses such as rent, utilities, groceries, clothing, and miscellaneous.  Consider how much you will have to pay for childcare.  Figure out where you will have to sacrifice in order to afford your new single-income lifestyle.  If possible, try to have relatives that don’t work help provide care for your child.  Some single parents even manage to get themselves and their children “invited” over to dinner at relatives’ homes once a week or more often.#4 It takes a village….As the old saying goes, “it takes a village to raise a child.”  Note, it doesn’t say, “it takes two parents to raise a child.”  It is important that you set yourself up with a strong support system for you and your children.  You’ll need to surround yourself with friends and family that can help you out as much as possible.  Involve your children’s teachers in their lives by letting them know you are a single parent and that you would like to rely on their child development expertise.  Take your children to church or temple and try to develop new relationships with people that can lend an ear, a shoulder, or even a couple of bucks when you are running short on groceries and cash.  One of the most positive effects of single parenting is the focus on community that inevitably occurs.  Take advantage of this and enjoy it.