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"It is So a Big Deal!": Delaying Premature Ejaculation
Perhaps one of the most common health questions a doctor receives is help in preventing premature ejaculation. Although the spouse or girlfriend may say "it's not a big deal", at some time in a man's life he will be faced with ejaculating befrore the
partner is ready and will consider it a "big deal". When exactly this is, is subject to debate, but it is based on how satisified the man is ready to ejaculate.
What causes premature ejaculation?
No one exactly knows, but in a majority of cases it can be attributed to anxiety or nervousness. Younger men often have this problem, as older men tend to have a better idea on how to control their release. Some researchers states a man can reach orgasm within 3 minutes after penetration. Most women need orgasm after 8 to 10 minutes. This is often where the problem lies, with the man feeling guilty or ashamed of not controlling his ejaculation, preventing a woman from reaching orgasm.
What are the different methods in preventing premature ejaculation?
There are several techniques to try:
Masters and Johnson Method
This is the technique developed by the famous sexologists. It involves masturbation, either by yourself or with help from a partner:
Masturbate (lubrication with Astroglide may be helpful). Allow yourself to stop just before ejaculating, relaxing, even letting your erection to decrease. Repeat this until you have a better idea when you have reached the "point of no return". With a partner allow her to stimulate you either via mastrubation or oral sex, and then signal when you are close to ejaculating. Signalling can often come in the form of a gentle squeeze or, more bluntly saying "Stop" or "Slow down". It may take several attempts to be successful using the Masters and Johnson Method. Using this "start and stop" method during intercourse may take practice.
Squeeze Technique
This is a variation of the Masters and Johnson Method. This is where the partner "pinches" the tip or base of the man's penis before ejaculation. This decreases the amount of blood flow to the penis, causing the man to lose his erection.
The Pressure Point
If you are close to ejaculating you may want to know about nature's own Panic Button. Between the scroum and the anus there is a duct that can prevent ejaculation. Have yourself or your partner press with their fingers and you can often stop the ejaculation in its tracks.
The Muscle
Controlling the pubococcygeus muscle is another way of preventing ejaculation. This is the muscle we use to stop ourselves from urinating midstream. Learn to contract that muscle ten times a day and you can use this as another alternative of the start-stop method.
Second Time Around
Men often take a longer time to ejaculate during the second time of coitus. If the first time was too quick, you may want to engage in extended foreplay or oral stimulation while preparating for a repeat performance.
Condoms
Condoms can help decrease the amount of stimulation during intercourse. Ribbed condoms are often the least sensitive. Of course, their greatest importance is in preventing sexually transmitted diseases and pregnancy.
Desensitization Creams
Out on the market are creams that contain anesthetic gels similar to use in offices to decrease stimulation. Most common are the creams that contain the active ingredient benzocaine. Your mileage may vary on these, as some men feel that they make intercourse less pleasurable.
Positions
It is suggested that laying down with the woman on top is the best way of prolonging an erection during intercourse. This causes the man to be relaxed and can better guide their thrusting to delaying the inevitable. The missionary position is often considered the most difficult one to preventing early ejaculations.
Sometimes men go to their doctor for this problem. Recently, primary care physicians and urologists have been prescribing medications to reduce anxiety in helping with premature ejaculation. Zoloft and Klonopin are medications that have been tried. Although considered an off-label use for treatment, Viagra has also helped with premature ejaculation particular those who suffer from intermittent impotence as well. Other times a referral to a sex therapist or psychologist may be needed. Premature ejaculation is a common problem that can seriously affect a relationship or marriage. It is important that couples are upfront with the problem so they can work on doing something in fixing it.
