Top Tips For Kidney Donation After The Surgery
If you are preparing to give your loved on a kidney then you'll be getting lots of information from your doctors and nurses. This is the advice that they won't give you, from someone who has donated! Here are some top tips to help you look after yourself after the surgery.
- Remember you are in charge – no one knows exactly how you feel; it is your life and your body.
- If you are in pain and the nurses try and fob you off,
demand to see a doctor – don't be a hero, you've already done that. It is also the doctor's decision when you can go home – be very nice to them.
- It is not your job to look after the recipient – you are in no fit state. Let the nurses look after them – do not start carrying stuff for them as you would do normally – you are probably in a weaker state than them. Some hospitals actually separate donor and recipient in different wards for this reason, and I can see why – but I was very glad to be in the same ward as my brother.
- Start eating five pieces of fruit and vegetables a day as soon as humanly possible. Constipation is a real problem if you have any morphine based pain killers; morphine, codeine etc. Bananas rock (but hide them from any dialysis patients – as they can't have them!)
- Don't be embarrassed about taking a plastic chair into the shower with you when they finally let you take a shower. However you feel, after a few minutes you may be glad of the support while you rinse out your hair.
- Don't reach for anything. I think you are naturally cautious of picking things up, but reach for things without even thinking. You will be surprised by how much pain you can inflict on yourself just by reaching for a cup of tea or the remote control – DO NOT REACH FOR ANYTHING.
- Go to your GP (or the recipient's GP if you are not at home) as soon as possible, they will give you lovely strong drugs, even if the hospital won't.
- Keep snacks or biscuits close at hand so you can eat something when you take painkillers. Taking them too often on an empty stomach can unsettle your stomach. (My favourites were stem ginger cookies as stem ginger is a natural anti-inflammatory.)
- Get yourself into a comfortable chair as soon as you can. When I finally got home and into an armchair (as opposed to hospital chairs, which seem designed to inflict pain) I actually wept with relief. Alternatively pack cushions (you can never, ever have too many cushions after surgery and you may indeed fight people for them.)
- Cystitis – even if you don't usually suffer from cystitis, because there are stitches in your bladder it is very. My remedy for cystitis is as follows but use whatever works for you: drink huge quantities of hot fluids (tea’s the best) and then try not to pee for as long as possible, hot water bottle and paracetamol and natural antibacterial agents (such as garlic) might help. Nowadays I also swear by Manuka Honey (10+ strength) which I find is great for stomach bugs, chest infections, anything bacterial in nature, so yes, please get some of this in, just in case.
- Wait, wait, wait and wait again before taking a bath. You may be told 7 -10 days, but taking a bath may well cause your wound to open up, so play it safe and wait until you're really sick of showers. It is so not worth the hassle of going back in to see the surgeon because your wound is weeping (and it's gross.) Also, if they give you that see through plastic bandage stuff, think twice. I cannot tell you how gross that stuff is on a weeping wound – it made me gag and trust me when I tell you that you DO NOT want to throw up after surgery.
- Never underestimate the power of the hot water bottle and paracetamol, even if you found it totally useless for period pain. When it comes to wound pain this combination rocks (although it doesn't really compare to an epidural - when it works).
- If you have to go back into the hospital to see anyone make sure that you take lots of drinks and snacks. Unfortunately, as soon as you are an outpatient, you no longer get lunches and cups of tea and they may well leave you sitting there for hours.
- Swimming is bliss, the water supports the wound and all your freaky muscles. Just don't go in too soon. I wish I had gone in sooner, but if I was to guess I would say leave it until you are comfortable taking a bath, and can walk round the park once without having to spend the next day in bed.
- Order all heavy shopping over the internet - but don't leave it till the last minute - they're always late.
- Never listen to Radiohead. You're looking for something to listen to, you flip through, you think, oh yes I really like this one, five minutes later you're sitting on the floor blubbing. Don't go there.
- Remember that the people around you don't always know how you're feeling - let them know by whinging and moaning at all times.
- Insist on a physio. Either via your surgeon or your GP, ask to see a physio for some follow up… or you may, like me, end up creating problems in your body, which will sporadically surface over the years. If you can't get physio on the NHS you will usually be able to get a free course of physio if you have a private health care plan at work. This may be something you do at long intervals over months or even years as you get back to normal, but once again this is something that I really wish I had done sooner!
- Although you will not be advised to have a massage for about 6 weeks or maybe longer after a serious operation there are a whole host of other lovely healing treats that you can have. My older sister booked me in for a pedicure about a month after the operation and it was wonderful - especially as there was no way I could have got down there to do it! Look into other treats, maybe even try a few out before the surgery so you know the therapist, after all, you deserve some pampering!
- Remember, when things gets tough, that every day and in every way you're getting stronger, and there will come a point when you'll be able to forget all the bad stuff, and you'll be able to look at the person who has your kidney and look in the mirror and feel genuinely happy for both of you.
