In the journey of life, particularly during its middle phase, many individuals find themselves grappling with a seemingly simple yet profound question: "Do I truly know what I want?" Surprisingly, for a vast majority, the answer is no. This uncertainty can stem from various psychological and societal factors that cloud personal desires with doubt and fear.
Understanding one's true desires is a complex process influenced by numerous factors:
A personal anecdote illustrates this point vividly. During a visit to Boston to see my relatives, including my two-year-old great-niece, Sloane, I observed her unambiguous expression of desires, whether it was for her juice, cereal, or playtime preferences. Unlike adults, children like Sloane often display a clear understanding of what they want at the moment, unfiltered and unaffected by external judgments or fears of failure.
Even when adults can pinpoint what they want, several obstacles can impede achieving these goals:
Achieving personal desires is not merely about identifying them but also about strategically planning and executing actions to realize these goals. The process involves:
Just as a two-year-old relies on their support system to meet their needs, adults also need a robust support network to achieve their desires. This can include family, friends, or professional advisors. For those who can afford it, hiring a professional coach can be particularly beneficial. Coaches help clarify goals, create tailored action plans, and establish supportive practices and structures.
Understanding and pursuing personal desires is a dynamic and ongoing process that requires introspection, courage, and support. By adopting a child-like clarity and determination, and strategically overcoming adult-life complexities, individuals can navigate towards fulfilling their true desires, enhancing both personal satisfaction and overall life quality.
Reflections at the End of My First Half-Century
As my 50th birthday quickly approaches, I've been drawn to the question, what is midlife? Does it mean middle-age? I certainly don't use it that way. I recently read a survey that was taken of 50 to 59 year olds. They were asked at what age does middle-age begin? They were also asked at what age does old age begin? The average answers: 48 years and 72 years, respectively.
Transitions and New Beginnings
How are you dealing with the transitions in your life? The definition of transition is the act of passing from one state or place to the next. [A synonym is passage.] We often view transitions as changes and we all know how much we avoid change! Beginnings on the other hand suggest a wide open future full of possibility. The definition of beginning is the act of doing that which begins anything; commencement of an action, state, or space of time; entrance into being or upon a course; the first act, effort, or state of the secession of acts or states. Beginnings seem to be less hampered by change and the human mind's avoidance of change.
Celebrating Everyday Triumphs: The Unseen Value of Ordinary Achievements
In our bustling lives, it's easy to overlook the small victories that we achieve daily. This tendency becomes more pronounced as we age, often dismissing simple tasks we accomplish as trivial. However, recognizing these achievements can significantly enhance our appreciation for life and improve our overall well-being.
