Transform your Sex Life!

This exercise takes about an hour, so make sure you put aside enough time. Start by preparing your space. You'll be naked, so put the heating on at least an hour before so you'll be warm enough. Make sure you won't be disturbed. Unplug the phone and lock your door. After you have done stage one you can do the nest stage another day.

Before you start, it's important that you both agree this isn't a prelude to sex and genital touching is out of bounds for stage 1 and stage 2. You may find you become aroused during the exercise, but this isn't the aim. Take it in turns to be the touched and the toucher.

The receiver.

You just need to lend your partner your body for 30 minutes: 15 minutes lying on your front, then 15 on your back. You don't need to say anything unless something's uncomfortable.

The giver.

You focus your attention as much as possible on your sensations. Direct all your attention and intention on where you touch your partners skin and where your partner touches you when you swap places.
If you mind wanders during the exercise consciously bring it back to the places of your connection and what you are experiencing. If you start to try to please your partner just bring your focus on your touch.
This type of healing touch is
Very slow. Practice slowing your speed of touch by half.
Pressure free with no goal at all.
Focused on pleasure of touching your partner, not giving pleasure.
In the here and now. Bring your mind back to your touch if you drift off.

Explore your partner's body from head to toe, first the back then the front. Avoid the genital area. Focus totally on your sensations of touch. Think about the different textures and temperatures of your partner's body. Think about how it feels to use hard and soft, long and short strokes.
Use your fingertips, palms and the back of your hands. A touch that just touches the hairs of the skin can be very pleasurable. Also, go very slow in moving your hands and this helps you be more present and out of your head.
Also scan your body time to time. You could be surprised at feelings of energy in your body as you touch.
Remember - this isn't a massage. The point is to focus on the pleasure of touching your partner, not giving pleasure. You can do that another day.

When you've finished swap over.
It is important both partners take turns. If one partner does not want to swap this could mean some relationship issues you both need to address.
After the hour's up, don't analyze it straight away. In fact, agree that you won't talk about it for 24 hours. This will help you focus on the sensory experience, rather than rationalizing the process.

The second stage allows partners to touch any part of the other's body, including the genitals and breasts. However, the focus remains the same-on the sensation of touching, not on sexual response. Intercourse is not allowed. Again the focused is on pleasure of touching your partner, not giving pleasure.

The third step involves mutual touching, eventually leading to sexual intercourse as the couple becomes more comfortable with the pleasure of the here and now of touching and being
touched. The focus is on enjoyment rather than on orgasm.

One can next add more communication to the exercise. Explore what parts of your lovers body is most sensitive.
Ask for feedback to map your partners erotic zones.

My tip. Try sucking the big toe! When you have sucked one try both at once!

After you do the exercise, ask yourself did you feel more comfortable in the giving role or the receiving role? How much of the time were you totally present in your touch?