Being unfaithful can be either emotional or physical. A person can either cheat on their partner by sleeping with or dating another, or they can allow another person to invade their heart.
An American Sexual Behavior study quoted on the askmen.com website reveals that 14 per cent of married women "have cheated at least once", while for men, the figure is higher at 22 per cent. Although other surveys rate the figure as much, much higher with some studies claiming that up to 60 per cent of men and 40 per cent of women have been unfaithful to their partner.
The site then goes on to list the top 10 reasons why women cheat:
1. Retaliation for his betrayal
2. Departure strategy
3. Chamber boredom
4. His emotive withdrawal
5. Feeling uncared-for/brushed aside/underappreciated
6. Lack of closeness
7. Revenge/retribution for past wrongfulnesses
8. Dignity
9. Being the bad girl
10. Not sufficient sex
While statistically men cheat more often than women, psychologists agree that females are catching up to men. Sometimes, a woman cheating is viewed as 'more serious' than a man cheating because, well, boys will be boys are hormonally set-up to spread their seed – so says conventional wisdom, anyway.
As the old adage goes, 'men cheat for physical reasons and women cheat for emotional reasons'. But female sexuality is still a poorly understood area, and it will be some time before science and psychologists agree on the difference between men and women cheating.
It doesn’t matter who's doing the cheating, infidelity in a relationship is a deal breaker for most couples. Although it doesn’t have to be...
Matilda, a 32-year-old with a young son, (posted this comment on our dating blog) cheated on her husband after she felt he had lost interest in her sexually after the birth of their baby. "I had just been through this massive life change and felt quite blue. An old flame came in from out of town and we went out together during the day, with my son, while my husband was at work. We didn’t sleep together. It was emotional infidelity. I think just having someone interested in me for who I am made me feel good about myself. A couple of my girlfriends know about my cheating but they get angry with me when I say it saved my marriage. Well, it saved my self esteem anyway."
It's easy to judge cheaters. To think we're above that 'despicable' act. But in reality, relationships are complicated and we're all capable of cheating.
If you've cheated, it doesn’t mean you’re a bad person or even that your partner isn’t right for you. But it does indicate that there are problems in your relationship.
Look at yourself and your partner and be honest with yourself and dig deep to find the reason behind the indiscretion.
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