What’s Normal?

The month of January was a very hectic time for me.  Between helping to get the newly populated Board of Directors of the local chapter of the coaching association I belong to off the ground, to providing administrative support for a charity dinner that I do annually each January, to selling a previous condominium I own, I found a lot of items competing against the time I devote to my business and my clients.  As many of those activities completed or became better established, I remember saying to myself, “Boy, it’s great to get back to normal”.  Around that same period, a couple of my clients were also balancing a number of occurrences in their life that were situational at best, and not those that they face on a week to week basis.  In working sessions with them that “normal” word surfaced again as they expressed relief as they were looking to move forward and focus on that which was most important to them in their life.

I suspect similar feelings have happened to you.  Yet as I thought about it more I remembered back to my coaching studies when as students we were challenged with the question, “So, what’s normal?”   When you give this question some thought, you come to realize that my definition of normal may be very different from your definition of normal.  In thinking about it further in terms of my own circumstance, I began to realize that what my definition of “normal” is for my life at present is significantly different than it was five to ten years ago.

Normal is definitely situational.  For me it has become “normal” to work with a number of clients in one on one coaching sessions during the week.  Normal has also included regularly writing this weekly blog and my monthly newsletter.  It has also included becoming an active participant in my local networking group.  My schedule, while having certain items occurring regularly each week, also affords me enough flexibility to schedule in appointments as I need to and see fit.   In short “normal” has become a way that I have become comfortable experiencing my life and, at the same time, living it so that I am accomplishing that which I desire.

What works for me as normal certainly may not work for others.  Some thrive on a normal that has them on the go from place to place and activity to activity.  For others normal may be far more sedate and have little to no deviation to it as it happens throughout the day or week.  There truly is no right or wrong answer to the question “What’s normal?”

I do know a few lessons that were reinforced in me based on my experiences of the last month.  One is that when occurrences do come up, whether expected or unexpected, that may compromise your time against what you normally do, acknowledge that fact and don’t feel you must get everything done.  Take a look at the period ahead.  Adequately determine just how much the activity which is usually not there is going to take of your time.  Once knowing that, then look at the regular activities.  Which of them must you do with the time available to you?  Which ones can be postponed or rescheduled?  Is what you are facing a temporary situation, (one which you know will have a definite end date), or is it one which will be continuous and which may influence you to review what is now to be your regular schedule.

Another lesson is one of comfort.  What is comfortable for you to commit to be doing and what tests that level of comfort?  Again, are there tasks you can postpone?  Are there ones another may be able to do in your place?   Have certain activities become a part of what you do, but have little or no value?  Can they be removed from your schedule?  When you hit a level of comfort with the activities that are a part of what you do each day and through each week, a sense of calm does come to you so you are better able to enjoy doing what it is you are looking to accomplish.

Above all, do not make your definition of “normal” one that is imposed upon you by others.  Sometimes that imposition can occur based on the comments or expectations of others.  More often, we as individuals cause those expectations on ourselves.  I know I can be very guilty of that, feeling that being a person of responsibility, I must meet every item to which I commit and do so immediately.  Depending on the situation, that may not be realistic.  Only you can judge that for yourself.

So, what’s normal?  It’s a question that only you can answer for yourself.