How to Interpret Female Body Language

Interpreting female body language isn’t as difficult as you think. It’s firmly rooted in logic. Just about all flirtatious behavior aims to accomplish one of three things; get us noticed by the person we fancy, get us closer to them, and get them to have sex with us.

When we’re attracted to someone, our subconscious gives in to a natural urge to get close to that person. Mother Nature, thinks, ‘Here’s a prospective population booster’ and rings ‘all systems go’ alarm bells, instructing the rest of the body to look its best. She also connects with primitive, basic mating urges, suggesting they waft out some strong pheromone scents, and put the body on sexual standby.

If you're an intelligent bloke, you've probably already figured out women initiate contact around two-thirds of the time. Rather than going up and chatting, however, they do it by giving you the green light to approach them, via non-verbal flirting signals. This is the sole reason why most men think they've make the first move - they're usually the ones who swagger over to speak. While it might not be the first move, it is possibly the bravest. Crossing the floor isn't easy and few women risk it. Reduce your chances of face-to-face humiliation by becoming a master at reading the sexual signals that drew you there. These will give you a massive head start...

It's all Good News

She's looking at your mouth loads

It starts with the flirting triangle and becomes more intense as the flirting intensifies. The more infatuated she is, the more time she'll spend looking at your mouth while you're talking. If you've been doing a bit of autoerotic touching, she's got the hint and is fixated on it, imagining what it would be like to have your mouth on hers. Lick your lips and you'll see her focus shift to your tongue. Gosh. I wonder what she's thinking about now?

She's lightly stroking her outer thigh

We stroke ourselves for two reasons: to draw attention to a body part (eyes tend to follow fingers) and to subconsciously tease the person watching (bet you wish you were doing this).

She's checking out your bum 

Both sexes scan the body of a potential mate but do it very differently. Being more visual and usually more sexually aggressive, men scan from the ground up, eyes sliding over feet, legs, crotch, tummy, breasts, shoulders, and (finally) the face. Women scan less obviously and in a different order. They start at the face, having a good look at the eyes and mouth, then move on to hair and overall size and build. His clothes and accessories (a wedding ring, watch, shoes) are next, finishing on his legs and then back up to check out his crotch and...his bottom. It's a long journey from your eyes to your ass and the fact she's got that far means you probably passed on the other counts. If you've been chatting for a while, glance backwards next time you leave her for drinks/the loo. If her eyes zoom downwards, she thinks you're sexy. (If she's looking horrified, all those pizzas in front of the telly have taken their toll.)

Her shoulders flash

When we meet someone we like we don't just flash our eyebrows for a split second, we also do a shoulder flash. Without realizing it, we'll shrug our shoulders when we meet someone we find attractive. It's a small, quick movement but stay alert to it if you want to be one step ahead of the game.

She lets a strap fall off a shoulder

Revealing a shoulder is incredibly provocative. So is a glance back over one or stroking her own. Even shrugging your shoulders can be sexy if it's done in the right way.

She starts massaging her neck

Didn't I tell you women are great at this manipulation stuff? She doesn't really have a stiff neck, she's just aware this pose lifts her breasts and exposes her armpit (another sexual hotspot).

She'll stand with her legs apart, weight on one foot and hips tilted

This is the stance of a high achiever: researchers studied executives at seminars and found 75 per cent assumed this position within half an hour. It's also the posture of a sexually supremely confident woman.

She'll dart short, repetitive glances your way

This says ‘Of all the things 1 could look at, you're the most interesting to me.’

She looks straight at you and flips or tosses her hair

Some women toss, flicking their hair back with a head movement, others flick it back, using their hand. The second isn't just preening: by lifting her arm and brushing it through her hair, she's wafting pheromones in your direction from the sweat glands of her underarm. If she catches your attention, does either a toss or a flick, then looks back again, get yourself over there.

She'll flash her wrists

Wrists are a definite erogenous zone. Back in the days when women wore neck to knee clothing, the wrist and ankles were the only flesh ever exposed in public. Watch groups of women smoking to see a dramatic illustration of wrist turning as a flirting tool. Surrounded by just her girlfriends, each girl will usually have her wrist turned to face her own body whenever she lifts her cigarette to her mouth. The second a gorgeous guy appears, all wrists, magically and in unison, tend to turn outwards or to the side.

She'll lick her lips, fluff her hair, and generally preen while looking at you

‘I'm making myself look even more attractive - and it's all for you.’

Her hands start to glide over her arms and neck

Yep - it's autoerotic touching at work again.

She'll do a whisper and lean 

If she lowers her voice and moves her head close to yours, she's inviting you to share her personal space. It's a thinly disguised ploy - if she speaks so quietly, you're almost obliged to lean forwards - but it works

She moves her head closer to yours generally

The more we desire someone, the closer our heads get. The effect is two-fold: it excludes anything else from our field of vision and unconsciously prepares us for the first kiss. The most intimate pre-kiss position possible is where both your eyes are in line with each other's but still clearly in focus.

She'll sit with her inner thigh exposed

If one leg's tucked under her, revealing her inner thigh, and her head and body also point towards you, consider yourself wanted. She's revealing quite an intimate part of her body you'd normally only see during sex.

She smiles broadly

A huge, genuine smile delivered with direct eye contact is still the clearest signal of all she wants you to come over and talk to her.

She'll fidget with her clothes

When we're aroused by someone, our clothes seem suddenly restrictive. Lots of people start removing layers, undo buttons, or hike up skirts. Note how many buttons she's got undone and see if a few more have magically freed themselves while you were getting drinks. Keep an eye on her thighs as well (I know, it's a hard job) to see if her hemline has risen along with your expectations. She'll start invading your space with objects. Unfortunately, it's more likely to be a wine glass, rather than the keys to her apartment or personal body parts. If you're in a restaurant or bar, she'll gradually push her wine glass from her side of the table over to yours. If she's confident you're attracted to her, she'll leave it (and her hands) there, hoping you'll touch them.