How You Can Use an Opener to Initiate a Conversation

"How do I initiate a conversation with a woman?"

This is a question I receive all the time from my loyal readers.  What happens is these men spot an interesting woman, but they have no idea how to walk up to her and start talking.

Unfortunately many of them make the mistake of using some corny pick up line they heard from their friends.

Now let me tell you a little secret…

Pick up lines NEVER work

When you use a pick up line, you're telegraphing your interest and showing a lack of originality.  Instead of attracting women, your pick up line is instantly repelling them.

So how do you initiate a conversation without using a pick up line?

It's simple…

All you have to do is use an Opener!

What is an opener?

Basically an opener is a type of conversation starter which can instantly attract the interest of women.  It's used to begin a conversation, get their attention and then transition into getting to know them better.

It differs from a pick up line because it involves getting their opinion and getting them to talk.  An opener differs because it doesn't make you look cheesy or lower status.

Openers work for many different reasons.  Primarily an opener works because:  

1)      Women love to give their opinions

2)      You can use their answers to latch onto a conversation topic

3)      You're not telegraphing your intention

4)      You'll appear to be funny while being interesting at the same time.

The key to creating a good opener is it should be an open-ended question which involves all the people in the group you're approaching.  What you're trying to do is walk up to a group, ask their opinion and get them talking. 

So the opener should NEVER be question which can be answered in a quick yes or no.  Instead it should get them talking and make them interested in what you have to say.

Now here are few rules you can use to craft a good opener:

First you have to give them a time constraint.  If a group thinks you're going to stay for a few minutes, they'll be more likely to open up and be friendly.  Then once you've attracted their attention, they'll forget about your time constraint.

Next your opener should be interesting and funny.  In order to be fun, try to keep your conversation starter light hearted.  You should fabricate a opener from your life or use something which provides and excellent topic of conversation.

Finally you have to give them a reason why you're asking their opinion.  In other words, you can't give the appearance that you're randomly walking around the room asking people questions.  The best technique is to let them know that you were having a conversation with your buddy and you needed a woman's opinion.

What you want to do is sit down and craft 3-4 different openers which can be used in different environments.  Just think of funny or interesting things within your life and then craft an opener around it. 

If you're stuck, you can use this opener which many guys have used to great success. 

It's called the "G- String Opener":

You Say: 

"Hey guys, I'm on my way out, but I wanted to get a quick opinion from you all.  I was just talking to my buddy and we were discussing a mutual friend.  This guy totally messed up with his girlfriend and cheated. 

Unfortunately his girlfriend found this other girl's G-String underneath his bed.  To cover for himself, my friend told his girlfriend that he has a fetish for wearing women's underwear.  What's funny is his girlfriend loves this idea and now makes him wear her underwear.

So I was wondering what you guys think:  Do you think he should continue to cover for himself or should he come clean with his girlfriend?"

This opener is effective because it's interesting and funny at the same time.  Once you use this opener and get their opinion, you can transition into other topics and find out more about the group.

Now I encourage you to sit down and create your own opener.  Try to tailor it to your personality and make it funny. 

Just remember that openers are a great way to initiate a conversation and they will ALWAYS beat out a corny pick up line.